ASK Musings

No matter where you go, there you are.

CBR6 Archive

Saturday

29

November 2014

0

COMMENTS

The American Way of Eating

Written by , Posted in Politics, Reviews

Two Stars

americaneating

Ms. McMillan decided to explore how food works in the U.S. To do this, she took a decidedly Barbara Ehrenreich approach: she went out and worked in the field. Literally. She chose to seek work in the California central valley as a farm worker, in Michigan as a Wal-Mart supercenter grocery employee, and as a cook at Applebee’s in Brooklyn, New York. She allowed herself a small cushion of funds with each new job to help with finding a place to live in her new cities, but if she ran out, she did what people who don’t have nest eggs to pull from: she took out an advance on her credit card, or just went without.

Each section starts out with a page that lists her hourly earnings, what that would translate to weekly and annually after taxes, as well as what percentage she spent on food, broken down by eating out and cooking at home. As expected, the work she did was hard, the money she earned was ridiculous, and in many cases it was just easier to eat shitty food than to find the money or energy to cook well.

Some of the author’s observations are quite interesting and good to see; her main take-away is that healthy eating isn’t just about the availability of fresh food, as so many campaigns want us to believe (have you had that ‘food desert’ ad, featuring two kids, in an endless loop on Hulu like I have? I now loathe that ad). It’s also about having a solid education in how to cook (which so many of us don’t), a job that provides the wages AND the time and energy to do that cooking, and a supportive public system like adequate healthcare and child care to allow people to cook instead of eating out.

From my perspective, the most surprising thing was how little cooking actually happens at a restaurant like Applebee’s. I spent one summer working as a hostess and busser at a local restaurant, and other than the giant vat of butter we kept cooling in a sink from which we would scoop a dish to bring out to the fancy tables, everything appeared to be cooked and prepared in the kitchen. Not so with Applebee’s. Yikes.

This book is written pretty well. She manages to weave in statistics and other information in well, and I found her sections on Wal-Mart and the private food supply chain to be very interesting. However, and I knew this going into reading the book – why did SHE need to tell this story? A college-educated, white woman? Come on. Couldn’t she have actually interviewed people who had their own stories to tell? I mean, obviously she did do that to a degree, but this was the Tracie McMillan story, and it absolutely did not have to be. I mean, at one point she is hired on part-time at a Wal-Mart outside of Detroit, and all I could think was that she was taking a job away from someone who actually needed it. I couldn’t get over it, and I don’t necessarily think this book needed to be written in this way. I’m not recommending it, mostly because I think there are a lot of other, better ways to learn about these industries, that don’t involve taking jobs away from people who need them, or replacing the voices of poor people, many of whom are people of color, with the voice of a middle-class white woman.

Sunday

23

November 2014

0

COMMENTS

Redefining Realness

Written by , Posted in Feminism, Reviews

Four Stars

janet-mock-book-coverYou might be familiar with Janet Mock. She has been a writer for People magazine (which I unapologetically read every week), and more recently has shared her story of being a trans woman of color in a feature for Marie Claire magazine. I first learned about her where I learn about many things that aren’t necessarily covered on CNN or in the New York Times: on Twitter. I’d see her comments retweeted by other people I follow, and learned about her book when it came out earlier this year. I had originally purchased Lena Dunham’s book to read this month, but exchanged it for this one because I realized I don’t really care what Lena Dunham has to say about things, but I do care what Ms. Mock has to say about things.

This book is a memoir that focuses mostly on her youth, starting with her memories as a young child in Hawaii, through moving to New York City for graduate school. Ms. Mock was assigned the gender male at birth, but never felt connected to that; she felt like a girl. Her story is fascinating, surprising, and at times heartbreaking. It can almost read like fiction, because it was difficult for me to realize that someone could experience what she did and come through it not just to survive, but to thrive.

Ms. Mock faced many disadvantages growing up, but she also recognizes that she had some things that other trans youth do not have. Early on she found her best friend Wendi, who was also trans, and helped her to not be alone at school. She is a very smart person and was able to earn a scholarship for college. Her family was supportive of her as she took more steps to make sure that her actions and appearance matched how she felt – she was not thrown out of her home when she shared her reality with her mother. That’s powerful.

Her writing about accepting who she is, and especially about what it means to be a ‘real’ woman, made a strong impression on me. This idea that we value trans people more if they ‘pass’ for cis people, or that someone is lying if they don’t share that they were assigned a different gender at birth, places cis as the center of ‘normal’ when in reality being cis is just common. This sentence, coming on the second-to-last page of the book, is one I want to embroider and hang on my wall: “We must abolish the entitlement that deludes us into believing that we have the right to make assumptions about people’s identities and project those assumptions onto their genders and bodies.” Spot on.

I should say that I’m not used to Ms. Mock’s style of writing. I’ve read loads of memoirs, but most of them are written by comedians, and thus have a very different feel. I think she finds her stride about three chapters in (although who knows in what order she wrote the book), but I nearly stopped after the first chapter because the writing was so very … descriptive. At times I felt like there was some sort of adjective word count she felt she had to hit, that I was reading a book that suffered from a lot of ‘tell not show’ sentences. It’s not the type of writing I generally like to read, but the story behind all of those words was so interesting and powerful that either I figured out a way to accept the style, or it became less prominent as the book went on. No matter – I’m very glad I stuck with it.

Sunday

23

November 2014

0

COMMENTS

The Perfectly Imperfect Home

Written by , Posted in Reviews

Four Stars

I found this book at this local store called Watson Kennedy, which is the kind of store I could easily spend hours in. It’s the kind of place where everything costs just a little more than it probably should, and where items are organized by color instead of type. It’s the kind of place that sells several kinds of olive oils as well as antique etiquette books. Anyway, the reason I share this is because it’s also the kind of store that leads people to buy books they really don’t need.

This is just such a book, but it was actually a joy to read. It’s a coffee-table-type book filled with lovely illustrations and tips for decorating your home. The tips are great, and only a little ridiculous at times. It’s a well-written and useful book (hence the four star rating), and I found it inspirational. The only problems are that a) I don’t really have a budget to start adding things to our house (although my husband and I both dream of a new couch, and maybe a coffee table that isn’t a $19 shoe rack from Target) and b) we rent our apartment. So a lot of the suggestions – especially ones involving painting walls or hanging a lot of items on the wall – just aren’t practical for us right now.

However! Someday we will figure out a way to buy a place, and at that point I will pull this book out again and look it over. The suggestions about lighting were especially great, which is a sentence that really makes me feel like an adult. I don’t think 13-year-old me would think that I’d enjoy a book with a lot of talk about lamps, and yet I did. If you are lucky enough to be about to buy a house, or trying to figure out ways to decorate your home, I think this is a nice book to pick up.

Wednesday

19

November 2014

0

COMMENTS

Pro

Written by , Posted in Feminism, Politics, Reviews

Four Stars

After the shit show that was the (legislative side of the) election in the U.S. earlier this month, I needed to read a book that would both make me angry and inspire me. I hadn’t heard about this book before I saw it at our local bookstore, which surprises me, as I thought I was on all of the feminist killjoy mailing lists.

Pro is a well-researched, well-argued look at why abortion rights are so important. That “pro” stands for pro-choice, and it is explored from multiple directions and through different lenses. Ms. Pollitt’s main argument is that those who are “pro-life” aren’t actually pro-life, but more interested in policing the sexuality of women. This isn’t exactly ground-breaking; feminists have been saying this for years. But this book differs in that it lays out literally all of the arguments in favor of banning abortion (either at all stages of pregnancy, or at specific stages, or for different circumstances) and knocks each on down, showing the inconsistencies as well as the impacts these views have on very real women.

The book is over 200 pages long but it only has eight chapters, because each chapter is devoted to going really in-depth into an area of discussion. Early on she shares with us the data on U.S. views on abortion, and how they aren’t really that consistent with the actions U.S. voters support. She then explores the idea of “personhood,” and whether those who oppose abortion really do view the blastocyst, embryo, or first trimester fetus as a person with the same rights as the pregnant person (ultimately arguing that they don’t, because of the other actions they take). This is followed by an exploration of whether women are actually people, some myths about abortion, and then the concept that it isn’t so much abortion, but what abortion represents (woman’s increased control of her life) that pro-life people oppose. Finally, she ends with a look at why compromise isn’t actually an option, followed by what it would mean to truly support women as mothers.

The only problem I have with this book is one that I have with any book that talks about reproductive rights, and it is the complete lack of recognition of the trans issues involved. Yes, it is usually women who are the target of laws restricting abortion, but trans men can also get pregnant, and are victimized by these laws as well, and there’s just no mention of that.

The author claims the target audience of the book is people who aren’t really sure where they stand on the issue, and I agree that these folks might find this book interesting. I think it’s also great for those of us who are very clear on where we stand but could use a little additional education.

Tuesday

4

November 2014

0

COMMENTS

Yes, Please

Written by , Posted in Feminism, Reviews

Five Stars

amy poehler

“Good for her! Not for me.”

The above phrase first appears about a fifth of the way through Ms. Poehler’s excellent book. If you’re familiar with her “Smart Girls at the Party” project, it should come as no surprise that she offers up some pretty sweet life advice. I’m almost 35, and I don’t think I’ve seen that sentiment summed up so perfectly. I’m considering having it tattooed on my ass.

Not literally. Well, not actively, anyway. Maybe someday. But for now it is tattoed across my mind.

This book is not exactly what I expected. I was assuming it would be closer to what Tina Fey gave us with Bossypants. I know that comparing one pretty white rich comedian to another pretty white rich comedian isn’t exactly groundbreaking, but these days when I see Ms. Fey I think about Ms. Poehler and vice versa. I picture Amy/Hillary and Tina/Sarah standing at the podium during the Saturday Night Live cold open. I’ve always felt that I know a bit more about Ms. Fey (not that we really know anything about strangers, even after they’ve written a memoir) than Ms. Poehler, although I recall reading in Bossypants the story about Amy very bluntly telling Jimmy Fallon that she didn’t care if he liked something she did or not. That’s awesome.

After reading this book, I feel like I understand Ms. Poehler a bit more. She’s an interesting woman, and a complex one who can be very sarcastic, very blunt, and very sincere in the same paragraph. The sincerity threw me a bit, but I really appreciated it in this book. Unlike Neil Patrick Harris’s book (which I reviewed a couple of weeks ago), this one feels like an exploration. I’m not fooling myself into thinking it’s not a carefully curated version of herself that she’s choosing to share, but she is at least a talented enough writer to make the reader BELIEVE that she’s sharing something real with us.

And what she shares is a mixture of pride, shame, humor, and insight. She tells a story that does not paint her in a flattering light, and while I could take the cynical route and imagine that she did it to absolve herself, I don’t actually think she did. I think she wanted to point out how she screws up, and how sometimes she doesn’t make things right, or spends way too long before she tries to make things right. She talks about hard work, about her marriage ending, and about her childhood. The book jumps around, and at times it isn’t totally cohesive, but it felt real. I imagine that Amy Poehler is someone who would use the phrase “my truth” without irony or judgment. I don’t think I would have believed that before reading this book. I think folks are expecting a laugh-riot peek behind the life of a comedic genius, and while we get that peek into her life, it isn’t all (or even mostly) laughs. It’s funny, for sure, but it’s more than that. I haven’t enjoyed this type of book this much in a while. I plan to read it again, because I think there’s more for me to get out of it.

Friday

31

October 2014

0

COMMENTS

Food: A Love Story

Written by , Posted in Reviews

Three Stars

food a love story

I reviewed the audiobook version of Mr. Gaffigan’s Dad is Fat for Cannonball Read 5. He’s back with a new book, which I only discovered because of its prominent display at the bookstore, and the cover. The cover is clever – a cake topper version of Mr. Gaffigan next to a cake topper version of a hot dog, on top of a fancy wedding cake.

The book behind the cover is a nice, light, entertaining read. It’s a bit of a mishmash, with everything connected to Mr. Gaffigan’s love of food. But not in a ‘foodie’ way. Nope, this is about his love of all food, not just artisanal cheese from locally sourced cows. Sure, he devotes a fair amount of space to fancy steak, but a lot of it is about things like McDonalds, hot dogs, and pizza. It’s a hodgepodge that seems even more disconnected than your average collection of essays, and yet it still works. It’s something I appreciate, especially as I am someone who loves food as well.

In the beginning he talks through his view of the food that each region of the U.S. is known for, from coffee in the Pacific Northwest to crab in Maryland. As an aside, he is not a fan of the seafood the east coast loves – he refers to lobster and crab as sea bugs. I can relate. As a comedian who travels for a living, he is in the somewhat rare position of being able to share a pretty well-informed opinion about the different food available in cities across the U.S., large and small. Not many of us can say we’ve eaten in dozens of towns across the fifty states.

The book took a while to get going for me, but once it did, I found myself giggling and cackling, annoying my husband as I insisted on reading passage after passage out loud to him. The book is fun, and a nice read for when everything else has been just a little too much. October was a mostly shitty month in many ways, and an exhausting one at work, so this was what I needed. It isn’t perfect – the beginning does wander dangerously close to fat shaming – but for the most part it’s a nice palate cleanser between the heavier stuff.

Monday

20

October 2014

0

COMMENTS

Choose Your Own Autobiography

Written by , Posted in Reviews

Three Stars (two for the book and one for the premise)

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As we made our way to the gate before a two-hour flight home last night, we spotted this book. I knew it had come out recently, and realized that the format (ostensibly a ‘choose your own adventure’-style autobiography) would probably lend itself better to a physical book. I picked it up and read it continuously, from waiting in line to board the plane until we caught a shuttle to our car back home. I read it on the elliptical this morning, and finished up the last ten of the nearly 300 pages after dinner tonight.

Now, despite his start as Doogie Houser, M.D., I mostly associate Mr. Harris with Barney Stinson, his character on my favorite sitcom, How I Met Your Mother. As my husband can attest, I will re-watch the shit out of that show on Netflix Streaming, and when I’m felling sad I’ll seek out the blooper reels online for a guaranteed laugh. I had high hopes for this book, but I’m a bit disappointed. It’s not the best comedic memoir I’ve read, nor is it even one of my favorites. (And if you check out my CBR5 reviews, you’ll know that I read a LOT of comedic memoirs, so I do have a frame of reference).

The trick he chooses – writing the entire book in the second person, turning the reader (“you”) into “Neil Patrick Harris” – is a fun one. It does allow for some unexpected moments, although I must admit I didn’t actually choose any adventures; I just read the book straight through, and it worked just fine. Mr. Harris is a national treasure, so I feel a bit odd being critical of the book, but aside from the occasional clever bits, I don’t actually feel like I got much out of reading the book. I mean, I enjoyed learning about his early career, and his experiences dating, and the choices he’s made in life, but the second person convention sort of allows Mr. Harris to write his story as a removed observer, preventing any sort of real connection between the author and the reader.

The book is also obviously going to be filled with enough dropped names to sink a ship, and that makes sense. That’s been his crowd since he was sixteen. But there’s something a bit off-putting about a chapter going on and on about gosh golly gee how cool is it to hang out with Elton John in Greece? I don’t think Mr. Harris is insincere, or bragging, there’s just something a little strange about how it’s presented. I also have some issues with the device he uses of having some folks pen letters to him to include in the book, that basically just go on and on about how great he is. I’m assuming they are real letters; they aren’t gushing enough to be satirical, they’re just sort of, I don’t know, really self-indulgent. And obviously any memoir is going to be self-indulgent. I don’t know – I’m having trouble articulating because I really want to like this book, and I really still do like Mr. Harris, and putting one’s life story essentially up for critique is impressive as hell, but at the same time … this book just wasn’t for me. I’d give it two stars, but the originality bumps it up to three for me.

Thursday

16

October 2014

0

COMMENTS

#Newsfail

Written by , Posted in Feminism, Politics, Reviews

Five Stars* (see update below)

There’s an awesome podcast out there called Citizen Radio, and it is amazing. The hosts are a comic and journalist, respectively, who record at their home and talk about news that either doesn’t get covered or that gets covered in ridiculous ways. There is a ton of swearing, a lot of joking, some bizarre recurring characters (“Republican Baby,” for example), and a crap ton of actual, honest, news. Citizen Radio is independent media that seeks the truth without being worried about what sponsors are going to think. It’s funding wholly by members like me, but is available to everyone for free.

What does that have to do with this book? Well, this book is written by the hosts of Citizen Radio. It’s a progressive look at the ways in which the news fails: fails to tell us the truth, fails to cover the stories that matter, and fails to do what journalism should do. It’s an easy read (as in, it’s written conversationally; the topics themselves are not in any way light), and organized into general topics that are illustrated with examples of the ways the news has failed to cover the topics properly. The authors address class war, sexism, LGBT rights, gun control (or “massacre prevention,” as they wisely call it), drug policy and foreign policy. The chapters have fantastic titles like “We Know You Smoked Weed in College, Asshole: How the War on Drugs Is Destroying This Country.”

The book is great; when it ended I wished there were more for me to read. I wish they could have taken on even more topics – I feel like there’s enough failure of the media out there on such a wide range of topics that they could write at least one more book, if not two. They point out the problem with presenting “both sides” when there aren’t actually two reasonable sides. A good example of this is climate change. When the vast, vast majority of scientists find truth in something, it doesn’t make sense to have one climate change denier on to debate one scientist. That’s irresponsible. Of course, as Kilkenny and Kilstein point out, scientists (or experts on the issues) are rarely even invited to contribute to the discussions. Instead of the experts on an issue, or those directly impacted by an issue – say, reproductive health – being invited on, you get a panel of older white men. No white women, no women of color, just old white politicians talking about putting an Aspirin between a woman’s knees as effective birth control.

The book is filled with rough language, and includes a smattering of anecdotes from the authors’ lives. Much like their podcast, the book makes me laugh, makes me angry, and motivates me to take action. I read a more diverse array of topics now than I did before I found their podcast. I’ve always been what I’d describe as liberal; now I know that a better term to describe my beliefs is progressive. While some might pass this book off as preaching to the choir, the reality is that while much of what they say might be more radical than the average liberal’s thinking, they back it all up. They provide support for those beliefs that you might have been thinking, but haven’t seen supported when you watch CNN (or MSNBC, because really that station isn’t nearly as liberal as people think).

If you care about politics, journalism, the media, or any of the topics covered in this boo, I strongly urge you to pick it up. And next time you’re on iTunes, or Stitcher, please check out Citizen Radio.

*Feb 28, 2017: Yesterday some very concerning items came out about Mr. Kilstein. Multiple women have shared that he emotionally manipulated and abused them. That is horrifying to hear; Ms. Kilkenny (who split with Mr. Kilstein prior to these revelations) will be continuing Citizen Radio without him.

Saturday

11

October 2014

0

COMMENTS

The Circle

Written by , Posted in Reviews

Four Stars

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It took me two days to read this 500 page novel. I’ve read two of Mr. Eggers’s books before: Zeitoun and A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius. I enjoyed the first one (as evidenced by my review of it this year), and I think I liked the second one, although it’s been awhile since I read it. But I have no doubt about this book. I thoroughly enjoyed it, more so than I think the other two Cannonballers who reviewed it this year.

The Circle is a company that feels the terrifying baby of Facebook and Google (or even just Google, if Google+ had actually worked out). It’s a technology company, with over 10,000 employees who are working in an environment similar to a giant tech start-up from the late 90s. There is work to be done, but it’s also supposed to be Fun! There are concerts and classes and discussion groups and a gym and parties. It reminded me of the first time a friend of mine showed me the new Bloomberg offices (the company, not the mayoral administration), and it had a kitchen full of free food. My first thought was about how convenient it all was; my second though was that it made it a lot easier to not leave work and return to the rest of one’s life.

That’s one part of the issue Mr. Eggers is trying to discuss in this book. Where should the line be between work and home? We hear buzzwords like ‘community’ thrown about at work all the time. It seems ideal to like where you work and the work you do, but should there be a line where your socializing at work end and your socializing at home begins? Is home your ‘real life,’ and is it better if that stays separate from work, or is it better if it all merges together, so long as you enjoy it?

That blurring of work and home life leads to the heart of the issues that Mr. Eggers discusses here. What should be the difference between private and public? Should anything be kept private? If so, why? If you keep something to yourself – whether that is knowledge, or a picture of a remote place, or an experience you had – are you being selfish by denying it to others who might not have a chance to experience or view it? Said differently – if you believe you have a right to something, am I obligated to give it to you? Does that change if the “I” in question is a private citizen, a private company, a non-profit, or the government? Because I casually mention on Facebook that I went on vacation, does it make sense to have that information catalogued and made accessible to anyone who is interested in, say, crowd sourcing a book for tourists who want to visit the places I visited?

I’d love to write a paper on the arguments The Circle (the company, not the book) makes. For example, at one point the leaders are discussing Julian Assange, and how the government was mad he made the information public, but that we all benefitted from it, and no one got hurt. But I think that a lot of people who would support Assange would balk at the idea that private citizens owe transparency to our fellow citizens in the same way. Yet that’s what The Circle is arguing. The Circle also tries to make this knowledge a social experience, tying all marketing together and giving that information away as well. I don’t recall who said it, but it reminds of the idea that “if the service is free, then what they’re really selling is you.” Social media today is already basically a way to sell marketing information under the guise of connecting with our friends. And for some of us, it’s great to know what a classmate who lives 5,000 miles away is doing without having to exchange multiple letters or emails. But it can also be a bit disconcerting to see the ads on the side of the Gmail window that are based on keywords from emails I’ve sent. That email is ‘free’ because I’m providing Google with loads of information.

Then there’s the fact that all of this social interaction can have a real impact on relationships. The neediness that can come out when someone sends a text but the recipient doesn’t reply. Or the popularity of pictures – and the feeling people can have if no one ‘likes’ their status, or comments on something they’ve said that they think is profound. People you’ve never met might think they know you, or that you owe them something, if you’ve interacted online. It’s disturbing.

The novel isn’t just about the company, though; it’s about Mae, a very young woman who gets hired thanks to her former college roommate. I think this is where I part ways with my fellow Cannonball reviewers. I absolutely believed her actions, mostly because she was so young and somewhat desperate. I also think that Mr. Eggers did a great job of making some of the people she disagrees with, well, jerks. At least, people Mae sees as jerks. If someone she respects a great deal makes the same arguments – or makes them in a different way – I can see her taking different actions. But I think she’s fragile, and chooses to believe the good.

But I also don’t think she just jumps right in from the get go. She has her separate space and hobbies, and seems more interested in doing well at the company than in buying into the company itself. In the beginning she wants to succeed and wants to not let her friend down; I didn’t get the sense that she was also really into The Circle in terms of what it represented. I think a character written differently would have gone the Katniss Everdeen route, and would have resulted in a different story altogether. I think Mae was kind of perfect for the parable Mr. Eggers is telling.

As much as I enjoyed reading it, this book did freak me out. And more than a little bit. So much of it was so close to where we are now that I can see how it could come to pass. That is fucking terrifying.

 

Thursday

9

October 2014

0

COMMENTS

The best punctuation book, period.

Written by , Posted in Reviews

Three stars

Do you know the difference between an em dash and an en dash? Or when you should spell out numbers and when you should write the numerals? Do you care? If you answers were no, no, and yes, then I have a book for you. It is part narrative and part reference book, and the type of thing that I want to have at the office for business writing and at home for things like Cannonball Read reviews and personal blog posts. It’s functional and easy to navigate, although it is a bit dry.

I can’t remember where I got this one – probably at the local bookstore that I need to avoid most days if I don’t want to drop $50 on books I never knew I needed or wanted. As I mentioned in an earlier review this summer, I write a lot. Most of what I do at work involves writing plans that other people need to understand; at home I write for fun and am currently working on my first book (that some day future Cannonballers might read and review – a girl can dream). I’m not an editor, so I probably didn’t need this book, but I do think it will improve my writing.

It’s a logically organized book, with sections on each punctuation symbol, from the comma all the way down to the aforementioned em dash. The chapters give overviews of the different functions and then breaks down usage by type of writing. So, in the colon chapter you’ll learn how to use a colon to introduce lists, as well as its function in writing out time or ratios. The different types of writing included are book, academic, scientific and news, with the suggestion that folks use news style for business writing and blogs. For pedants like me, it’s fascinating to see all the nuances of language, including disagreements about usage (that damn Oxford comma!) or decisions that seemingly don’t make sense.

Is this book going to change your life? No. But it’s interesting and useful, and I know I’ll be consulting it regularly.