ASK Musings

No matter where you go, there you are.

Monthly Archive: June 2008

Tuesday

24

June 2008

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COMMENTS

I’m in!

Written by , Posted in Adventures

It’s been a long week, but I made it. I’m in my new digs in the Slope. I love my neighborhood, my street, my building, and my apartment.

 

The movers arrived right on time, and took about an hour to load everything up. My (now former) roommate was kind and offered to come out to the place with me to help unpack! We got to the apartment a bit before the movers, but then they came and unloaded everything really quickly. Then Michelle and I got to work – she is a master at unpacking. We were done unloading all of the boxes and putting all non-clothing items away in less than an hour. 

 

We got brunch, then she came back and took away the boxes to use for her own move. I continued unpacking, and was soon joined by Jon Mark, and later John and Allegra. Now I’m seriously completely unpacked. Everything is put away, and all I’m missing is the couch, which should be delivered between 8AM and 1PM tomorrow. I still need to hit Target at some point to get those kitchen things like a pasta strainer and a dish dryer, but otherwise I’m all set!

 

This neighborhood is great. There’s so much to explore – I can’t wait to spend an evening wandering. I would have tonight, but there have been crazy thunderstorms on and off since 4 PM.

Monday

23

June 2008

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COMMENTS

Brain Droppings

Written by , Posted in Reviews

My alarm went off this morning to NPR, as it usually does. The first sentence that greeted me? “George Carlin, legendary comedian, has died at the age of 71.”


His book, “Brain Droppings,” is one of my favorites. It is the kind of book that I’ll pick up, open to any page, and laugh out loud. Or nod in agreement. He was great at pointing out common errors in grammar, or stupid turns of phrase. And so, in honor of him, here are a few choice sections.


“If something in the future is canceled, what is canceled? What has really happened? Something that didn’t occur yet is now never going to occur at all. Does that qualify as an event?”


“I know I’m fighting a losing battle with this one, but I refuse to surrender: Collapsing a building with explosives is not an implosion. An implosion is a very specific scientific phenomenon. The collapsing of a building with explosives is the collapsing of a building with explosives. The explosives explode, and the building collapses inwardly. That is not an implosion. It is an inward collapsing of a building, following a series of smaller explosions designed to make it collapse inwardly. Period.”


“A scary dream makes your heart beat faster. Why doesn’t the part of your brain that controls your heartbeat realize that another part of your brain is making the whole thing up? Don’t these people communicate?”


“You know what you never see? A really interesting set of twins.”


“Some people see things that are and ask, Why? Some people dream of things that never were and ask, Why not? Some people have to go to work and don’t have time for all that.”

Sunday

22

June 2008

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COMMENTS

Should I Stay or Should I Go (Home)?

Written by , Posted in Feminism

Last week I came across this interesting article from The Women’s International Perspective.


Why U.S. Women Earn So Little Money: The Wage Gap Isn’t Getting Any Better


I’ve been sitting on this topic for a couple of days because it’s really complicated, and yet shouldn’t be. 


Since I work in government, I know (or should I say, can know) the salary for every single person in my office. I can see if I’m making more than people performing similar work with similar experience, or if I’m making less. I haven’t compared because I’m content, for the most part, with my salary.


When I was in the private sector, however, we weren’t allowed to know what other people made. Yet I wasn’t too concerned then, either. I’ve never been good at negotiating salaries, or even determining what a fair salary would be for me. I have always just accepted what I’ve been offered. Some have argued that this is part of the reason why women make less than men: we don’t negotiate. Funny story, though – according to studies referenced in the above article, women face repercussions when we try to negotiate. Good times.


Money is a huge issue, and equality is a tricky thing, especially when some men might think that by bringing women up to their level in pay that means they might lose something. I have my own savings, my own money, and a job that allows me to live sans roommates for the first time since college. If I were to get married, though, what would happen? Assuming I have kids – and that’s a topic for another day – what would happen? Would I be expected to stay home? Would my imaginary husband be in a field with higher earning potential, thus making moot whether either of us wants to stay home? And if things didn’t work out and we got divorced and I had to go back to work – what would my earning potential and experience be then?


Women choose to have children, so are women at fault for needing more flexibility (and thus often less responsibility and less money) than men? It’s a choice, and isn’t choice what women have been begging to have for generations? Here’s the problem – it’s still not much of a choice to care for children. It’s still not as socially acceptable for men to stay home with the kids while the women work. There was an article in the New York Times Magazine this week – When Mom and Dad Share It All. It’s an interesting look at attempts to share the load as equally as possible. The fact that this even merits attention in a national Sunday magazine shows it’s obviously not the norm.


How many guys around my age think they’ll end up working part time or quitting when they have kids? I do wonder what it’s like to have that pressure of being expected (by society, if not by your wife) to support a few people. At times I do think it might be nice some day to have kids and get to hang out with them. My mother worked really hard at home to make sure my sister and I turned out normal. She didn’t go back to work until I was in high school, and while I don’t think she resents us for that, I know I appreciate her for it.

Sunday

22

June 2008

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COMMENTS

Chicago. Harlem. Barbes

Written by , Posted in Adventures, Reviews

There’s a bar in my new neighborhood called Barbes. There’s an accent over the ‘e’, but I don’t know how to make that show up on a Mac. Anyway, they have live music there basically every night, and it’s interesting music. Behind the bar is the performance space, and it’s in a tiny room, probably about the size of my old apartment. 20 people can sit, plus maybe a dozen can stand in the back.  What I’m saying is, it’s small.


Last night Herman and I went to see Brian Carpenter’s Ghost Train Orchestra. It’s a TEN PIECE BAND (remember the description of the space above?) featuring a tuba, trumpet, trombone, violin, viola, saw, banjo, clarinet, sax and percussion. They played music from the 1920s band era, mostly written by band leaders from Chicago and Harlem. To me, the songs all had a sound that made me feel like I was in New Orleans. It was loud and wonderful, and so not the kind of music that one expects to hear in a bar in most places.


If this sounds good to you, they’re playing at MOMA at 5:30 and 7:30 on Thursday July 24. I know I’ll be there.

Saturday

21

June 2008

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COMMENTS

One Week In

Written by , Posted in Adventures

I’ve been in the Slope for a week, and it has been a full one. Monday night we were ‘activated’ for storms that didn’t really materialize. Tuesday I met up with a coworker who lives in the neighborhood, and a couple of her friends, for some great Mexican food just down the street. JB helped me move my old AC (and some pie plates I’d left behind – thanks Michelle) from my UES place to my new digs, as the AC that I inherited in the new place just wasn’t cutting it. It didn’t quite fit, so we went to Loews and bought some wood to get it to sit in there properly. I also got a toaster – yay, cheap breakfast at home.  


Anyway, while I like to think I am quite capable of doing many household things on my own (hanging pictures as long as I don’t have to find a ‘stud’ in the wall, painting my apartment), some things I just don’t get. I’ve installed an AC before, but this seemed a bit complicated. Regardless, it’s in, and in just in time, as it is in the mid-80s today. Justin is now helping me to complete the stereotypically male tasks I need done, a duty that Michelle fulfilled herself quite nobly these past couple years. 


That’s not really that adventurous, however. But the past 24 hours have been better, in terms of exploring. Last night I went to Prospect Park and caught the first half of the Met Opera in the park. It was a perfect evening – coolish, clear, no bugs – and the set-up was great. I just plopped down and enjoyed the singing and the music. And afterwards – just a five minute walk to get home! I was pretty exhausted from a long week of work, getting settled, ‘leadership’ training (I liked it, whatever) and learning my new way around.


This morning I was up very early – 7:30! – and so cleaned the apartment, then went up to the Grand Army Plaza farmers market. They had some great strawberries that remind me of the tiny ones that grow in the backyard of the home where I grew up, so I bought a quart and have just been enjoying them all afternoon. I finally picked up some of those things one needs but doesn’t realize (for example, salt), and even exchanged an extension cord. 


Side note – I only have functioning three-pronged outlets on the far side of my apartment, away from the kitchen, so I had to buy an extension cord so that I could use the microwave or toaster. It looks pretty funny when in use, but who cares. 


I also did my own laundry for the first time in maybe three years. When I left the UES the first time I moved into two successive buildings with no laundry facilities. I loathe laundromats, so I got in the habit of taking it to the cleaner to be laundered. It’s expensive, but was worth it. Well, now, sweet lord, there are washers and dryers a mere 20 second elevator ride away. It’s so convenient. And a good way to meet the people in the building.


Today I found an independent guitar store – owned by women to boot – about a 20 minute walk from my place. Allegra gave me her old guitar two years ago. I keep ‘meaning’ to learn (I know the very basics thanks to about six months of lessons in high school), and this week I finally sat down with it . . . and promptly broke a string. So I found a little music store and bought new strings, then promptly realized I had not a clue how to re-string the guitar. And then I broke the nut. So yeah, it had to be fixed. The place I found – Mazzotti Music on 3rd at Carroll – was great. Low-key, and cheaper than the other places. So now I have my guitar and have been fiddling around with it all afternoon.


On the way back from the guitar store, I stopped for lunch on 5th and was reading this book “Equator” about a man’s travels around the north pole. Kidding, it’s about traveling the equator. I am on a section about Africa, and the busser – Frank – asked if I was reading about Africa. I told him about the book, and it turns out he is from Gabon, one of the countries I had *just* read about. He’s been here a year and is getting used to how quickly things move. Such a nice guy. I asked him if the President (Bongo – he’s hilarious) is still in power, and he is indeed. We had a nice little unexpected chat.


And, as I made my way up I made a purchase from a bake sale supporting Barack Obama. I guess this weekend is the nationwide bake sale, so if you like Obama, I’m sure you can find a way in your neighborhood to support him while getting a sweet treat.


Tonight more exploring with Herman, so hopefully I’ll have some more to share.


ENJOY THE FIRST FULL DAY OF SUMMER!

Sunday

15

June 2008

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COMMENTS

Fishnet knickers? Yeah, I don’t get it.

Written by , Posted in Adventures

Last night I was tired from all the moving in and such and figured I’d stay in for the evening. But then Justin called with an event too intriguing to miss. His guitar teacher was going to be playing in the LES. But not just in a typical band – in an eastern European band. Um, awesome.


The band was playing in a basement restaurant. When we first entered, it seemed a bit empty. Except for the . . . interestingly dressed women near a small bar. Picture in your mind a stereotype of an eastern European idea of classy, and you’ll understand what we saw. We moved into the main restaurant area, where the band was playing, and secured a space at the bar. The room was filled with mostly older folks, likely ethnically Russian, although there was an entire party of people there around my age who were definitely not ethnically Russian. Everyone seemed to be having fun and enjoying the music. The bad consisted of members playing the tuba, clarinet, horn, saxophone, guitar, fiddle, drums and accordion, plus a singer. The fiddle player especially was amazing.


I really enjoyed the music – I even signed up for their email list. It was fun and unexpected. But what occurred during one of the band’s breaks was REALLY unexpected.  


So when we first got there, as I mentioned, the women hovering near the smaller bar were dressed in an interesting manner. I missed one woman, but Justin noticed her (of course). She was wearing a sparkly silver thong and a satin jacket. And that was it.


During the break, someone starts telling us we should step away from the bar, and take our drinks with it, because someone was going to dance on it. Um, what? Had we found the Ukrainian Coyote Ugly? No – it was better than that. So, Sparkly Thong woman gets up on the bar (barefoot), and some generic “sexy” music starts playing. And she’s holding a bottle of vodka. I could tell you the brand, but I’d rather not promote it. Anyway, her dance was part of a promotion for the vodka.


She clearly has dance training (and had a killer body). I also notice she’s wearing fishnet knickers. With a run that had been sewn up. I’m not clear as to what possible purpose fishnet knickers might serve – why wear ‘nylons’ that end just below the knee?  


She’s dancing, and then she removes her shiny jacket to reveal a sparkly red bra. And she continues moving provocatively. I was trying so hard to not lose it. But it was close to impossible, ESPECIALLY when she TOOK OFF HER BRA. No wonder they were checking IDs at the door. She had some very sparkly red pasties on, and she did some more shimmying before ending with a full split on the bar. Frankly, that was just unsanitary.


To recap, the evening of my first night in my new place involved a few drinks, some great Russian music, and a striptease.  I love New York!

Thursday

12

June 2008

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COMMENTS

Good-bye Manhattan, hello Brooklyn!

Written by , Posted in Adventures

My walls are bare. All of my clothing is in garbage bags and suitcases. My files weigh a lot more than I thought. And I’m feeling all sentimental . . . which is nothing new. So, as I get a little sad about leaving, I thought I’d remind myself of what I’m getting in return.


Losing: 400+ square feet that I have to hike five flights to access.

Gaining: A huge closet.


Losing: A 10-minute walk to Central Park.

Gaining: A two-minute walk to Prospect Park.


Losing: An amazing roommate.

Gaining: A former roommate in North Carolina who I can go visit.


Losing: 15 minutes of reading time each way on three trains.

Gaining: An extra 15 minutes in bed in the morning and 15 minutes in the park at night.


Losing: A real refrigerator

Gaining: Access to a great food co-op.


Losing: The ability to ask my roommate a question late at night . . . through the wall separating our rooms.

Gaining: The ability to sing along (loudly) to my favorite songs without bugging anyone.


Losing: a half-dozen movie theaters within walking distance.

Gaining: a half-dozen friends within walking distance.


That last one sums it up – I’m so excited. This is very, very good.

Tuesday

10

June 2008

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COMMENTS

Serendipity

Written by , Posted in Random

After work I headed to the new place to do some unpacking, after the kind Justin helped me move some breakables last night. On my way back, I was so engrossed in my crossword puzzle that I missed my stop and ended up on Roosevelt Island. I headed over to the Manhattan-bound side to catch another train back (carrying my empty boxes), and enjoyed the air-conditioned F. As usual, I stared at the ads – foot surgery experts, child injury lawsuit experts, english experts – but noticed one of those subway poems brought to us by Barnes and Noble.


Usually I don’t really pay attention to them, but this one stuck out. It’s by E.B. White, excerpted from Here New York.  


There are roughly three New Yorks. There is, first, the New York of the man or woman who was born there, who takes the city for granted and accepts its size, its turbulence as natural and inevitable. Second, there is the New York of the commuter–the city that is devoured by locusts each day and spat out each night. Third, there is New York of the person who was born somewhere else and came to New York in quest of something. 

Of these trembling cities the greatest is the last–the city of final destination, the city that is a goal. It is this third city that accounts for New York’s high strung disposition, its poetical deportment, its dedication to the arts, and its incomparable achievements. Commuters give the city its tidal restlessness, natives give it solidity and continuity, but the settlers give it passion.

The rest of the essay is a bit darker, but I still like it, and I wouldn’t have noticed it had I not missed by stop.  

I always wanted to live in NYC, and while at times (especially this spring, when I was so close to moving to Seattle) I have been fed up with some aspects of the City, it really is an amazing place to live. Who knows what the future will bring, and who knows if this is where I’ll buy a home, get married, etc. But while I’m here, I’m going to keep loving it and taking in as much of it as possible. I agree – us settlers do bring the passion.

Monday

9

June 2008

0

COMMENTS

One weekend. Five boroughs. Two sisters.

Written by , Posted in Adventures

Stephanie heads back to Texas tomorrow, but she’s with a friend in Brooklyn tonight, so her visit with me is essentially over. Her visit (the sixth in as many years) actually turned into a five-borough subway/taxi/ferry tour.


Friday we hit Manhattan, the Bronx (zoo) and Queens (Water Taxi Beach). Saturday we kept it local and hung out in Manhattan. After a basic diner brunch (why is toast with grape jelly so good?) we headed downtown. Stepping outside was pretty fun – it was probably in the late 80s by the time we made it into the world. We headed downtown so that Stephanie could meet up with a friend to see the New Museum; I passed the time reading at Starbucks, mostly because of the air conditioning. (Note – check out “Equator.” It’s a great book). We wandered around in lower Manhattan a bit, then got super-yummy Mexican food before heading over to Moonwork.


Moonwork is a show that’s put on every 3-4 weeks from September through June. For $20, you get six acts (usually stand-up comics, sometimes monologues, sometimes funny singers, sometimes serious singers) and all the beer you can drink until it runs out. This line-up included Christian Finnegan, who I enjoy on ‘Best Week Ever,” because I watch too much TV. All of the performers were great, but a special treat was Leah Siegel. Wow. She has an amazing voice that reminds me a bit of the 1930s. And her songs are just lovely and evocative.


Sunday was another multi-borough day: Manhattan, Brooklyn and . . . wait for it . . . Staten Island. We headed to my new apartment so Stephanie could see the place and I could drop off my dishes. We met up with Justin for brunch, and then decided to take the ferry to Staten Island. Michelle and I had been talking about doing this for awhile, and planned to take the ferry, and then run around and hop back on. But Stephanie wanted to wander, so we did.  


And it was totally worth it. We may have melted in the heat, but man, the Staten Island Museum made up for it. One and a half floors of pure awesome, all for the low price of $2 ($1 with a student ID card). I won’t spoil it for you, but there is a ‘florescent rock room’ AND a flying squirrel in a jar. After a rinse off and a run through the thunderstorms that have been visiting as of late, we had dinner with a couple of friends at Brick Lane, my new favorite Indian place in NYC. Check it out.  


Tonight Justin helped me move my breakable and sentimental things – you know, framed pictures, shot glass collection, liquor – to the new place. The movers come Saturday, and it should only be in the low 80s, so that’s good.


I have to run and take my third shower of the day. Thank the gods for air conditioning.

Saturday

7

June 2008

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COMMENTS

I Heart NYC

Written by , Posted in Adventures

Since Stephanie is in town, we’ve been enjoying the sites. Yesterday after the traditional stop at Serendipity (oh, frrrozen hot chocolate, how I’ve missed you), we went to the Bronx Zoo. If any of you haven’t been, please go. It’s really fantastic. It feels like a huge park, which isn’t what I expected. But the key is to pay to see the gorillas. It was amazing to see them, and see how they interact with each other and with the visitors.


After a yummy dinner in my neighborhood (of course now that I’m moving I’m discovering all of these restaurant’s I’ve overlooked for the past two years) we headed out to Water Taxi Beach for Turntables on the Hudson. We met up with Jon Mark and Michelle, and relaxed on a picnic table overlooking Manhattan. It’s a great set-up – there is a dance floor under a tent, but then there are loads of tables set up where the music isn’t totally blaring. And the view is ridiculous.


Off for more adventures in the City.