ASK Musings

No matter where you go, there you are.

Wednesday

6

November 2024

0

COMMENTS

I Haven’t Been Entirely Honest With You by Miranda Hart

Written by , Posted in Reviews

Four Stars

Best for:
Those who have been going through some things and are looking for some sweet advice delivered by a lovely writer.

In a nutshell:
Writer and actor Hart updates her story by sharing her struggles with chronic illness, and what she’s found to be helpful in not just facing those challenges but in thriving as a person.

Worth quoting:
There’s a lot of wisdom in this book, and I wish I had a physical copy to follow along, but alas I didn’t write down any quotes while reading.

Why I chose it:
I somewhat enjoyed her previous book, and had heard this one was interesting. I didn’t quite know it wouldn’t be as traditional a memoir as expected, but I still enjoyed it.

Review:
Finishing this on the day the 45th US President was re-elected, Grover Cleveland-style, seemed appropriate. I didn’t know how soon I’d need her suggestions and positivity (the not-toxic kind).

Hart is an actress folks would know from her show Miranda, or from her role as Chummy on Call the Midwife, or most likely, from her role as Melissa McCarthy’s coworker ‘Amber Valentine’ in the movie Spy. You might have wondered why she seemed to disappear after such a successful role, and she answers that here.

For pretty much her entire adult life, Hart has had health issues, at times not being able to leave her home. She eventually shares her diagnosis, but the focus is on the things she’s learned and sought out to help deal with the frustration and exhaustion that came with her illness. For the book, she calls these her ten ‘treasures,’ and they are sort of what you might expect to find in a self-help book, but she shares them in a relateable way, with her trademark kind sense of humor.

There are a lot of great nuggets of wisdom she shares, pulled from lots of her own reading of a whole lot of ‘ists’ (like psychologists, therapists, etc.). One that really stuck out for me is something I am so often guilty of doing – going out for plans that I don’t want to do, and thinking ‘I’ll just pop in for a few then leave.’ And I love the way she frames that – about how unkind it is to treat spending time with others that way. Either go enthusiastically, or be honest that you don’t have the energy and don’t go. That might not work for others, but it really hit home for me.

There are lots of little bits that I think a lot of folks would benefit from hearing. It’s not groundbreaking, but its shared in a really accessible. Frankly, the book feels like a warm hug.

What’s next for this book:
I might purchase a physical copy to read over again and take some notes in.

Sunday

29

September 2024

0

COMMENTS

Here One Moment by Liane Moriarty

Written by , Posted in Reviews

Four Stars

Best for:
Fans of her previous work. Fans of books that follow multiple peoples’ perspectives. People who enjoyed ‘The Measure.’

In a nutshell:
On a delayed flight between Hobart and Sydney, Australia, a woman name Cherry walks up the aisle saying ‘I expect’ followed by an age at death and a cause of death for nearly ever person on the plane. Within a month or so, three of her ‘predictions’ turn out to be correct. So the question is – who is Cherry, what does she actually know, and is she right about everyone?

Worth quoting:
“Once you reach a certain age you come to accept strange behaviour from young people. They either look straight through you as if you’re a pot plant, or they treat you like you’re made of glass, hands hovering in case you tumble.”

“They just thought that if you worked hard most days then you could afford the kind of stuff that everyone else had. They have messed up big time.”

“When you live with someone who dislikes you in a mostly unspecified way, you begin to dislike yourself too.”

Why I chose it:
I love all of her books. I didn’t know a new one was coming out until I saw it mentioned online somewhere, and I immediately ordered it. Hardback, so you know I’m serious.

Review:
There are a few storylines going on in this book. There’s Cherry’s story, which jumps around a bit, but mostly starts now, with her in her 70s or 80s, and then goes back to her childhood, and is told in the first person from her perspective. And then there are the stories of a few people from the plane, told from a narrator’s perspective. There is Paula, who was told her baby son would die at age 7 from drowning; Eve, who was told she’d die by intimate partner violence at age 25 (bonus: the flight is for her honeymoon). There’s Leo, who will be dying soon from a workplace incident, and Ethan, who will also be dying soon, in an assault. Allegra, a flight attendant who is meant to die by self harm in the next year. And of course Sue, who has a few years before pancreatic cancer takes her.

The people on the flight mostly ignore the woman once they get off the plane. Then, a few weeks later, a teen from the flight, who was told age 19, car accident, dies during a live stream of her driving, very cautiously, at age 19. Then two elderly people who were to die soon of old age do die. So the folks on the flight begin to wonder – is this their destiny? For those with predictions in the next year or so, should they do whatever they can to avoid it? Should Leo quit his job until his next birthday passes? And who is Cherry? Does she have some sort of power of prediction? What’s her story? Where has she come from?

Moriarty is fantastic at developing characters even though they don’t take up the whole of the book. I feel like I know all of the main folks in the book, and understand where they come from with their thinking. Can they change their own destinies? If not, what do they want to be doing with the life that remains?

What’s next for this book:
Keep – I may read it again, or at least loan it out to people.

Wednesday

25

September 2024

0

COMMENTS

Anxious People by Fredrik Backman

Written by , Posted in Reviews

Four Stars

Best for:
People who like a mystery that doesn’t involve figuring out who killed someone; people who are interested in exploring people beyond what they choose to share.

In a nutshell:
Someone has robbed a bank, run, and is now holding hostage a group of folks at an apartment viewing.

Worth quoting:
“If the grass looks greener on the other side of the fence, that’s probably because it’s full of shit.”

“Most people never become individuals to us. They remain people.”

Why I chose it:
Two for one sale, and it looked interesting. To my delight apparently it was made into a Netflix series, which I plan to check out now that I’ve finished the book.

Review:
This book was an unexpected delight. Some things I was able to sort of guess, but for the most part, it just revealed itself and its messages slowly.

The book employs a bit of a Big Little Lies mechanic – witnesses are being interviewed before we learn who most of them are, and they are telling us information that only makes sense later in the book. The story goes back and forth between the events of the day — the bank robbery, the hostage-taking — as well as back in time a bit.

There are a lot of characters, and as expected, none are quite what the reader expects. They are complex individuals who are dealing with their own shit. And, at least initially, most of them come across as PROFOUNDLY annoying.

I listened to the audio book, and the actor did a fantastic job, because for awhile the title applied to me as I listed to some people using extremely annoying tones. Like, just bang on, to the point where I wanted to reach through my headphones and shake the characters to try to get them to communicate honestly, like human beings.

Without revealing too much – there’s a bank robber, two cops trying to catch the bank robber, and a real estate agent, two couples and two individual at the apartment viewing. There is also a therapist, a bank teller, and a priest. As one expects, we start out with just the amount of information you might have about other people at an apartment viewing that one only expects to interact with for a few minutes. There’s the couple expecting a baby, and the couple looking to buy the place as an investment. There’s a very rich person, and a very elderly person.

But once they’re stuck in the flat for hours in a hostage situation, we learn more about them, about the things and events that have led them to this moment. And this knowledge isn’t limited to just the hostages – we learn something about everyone involved, and what we learn relates to an exploration of what right and wrong really mean.

This book would be five stars for me but the very end seemed unnecessary. Don’t worry, the resolution of the situation is very satisfying, but there’s a couple of chapters at the very end that, while sweet, seem to be almost part of a different book. I’d say its to make up for some necessary withholding of information earlier in the book so as not to give away the plot, but it doesn’t quite work for me.

What’s next for this book:
Recommend to others.

Saturday

21

September 2024

0

COMMENTS

Decor Galore by Laura De Barra

Written by , Posted in Reviews

Three Stars

Best for:
Those just about to move into a new home (ideally one they own); those who are looking to make some changes to their existing home.

In a nutshell:
Author De Barra offers ideas on how to improve spaces throughout one’s home, whether by making just a few changes or completely overhauling the room.

Worth quoting:
She refers to DIY as She-IY and that’s just not for me.

Why I chose it:
We’ve been in our flat for nearly a year now, and some areas still are empty (e.g., pretty much every single wall) and I was looking for some inspiration.

Review:
De Barra breaks down her book into each room, offering some very detailed ideas about decor, but also things like lighting, fabrics, and ‘zones.’ The book has some great tips and explanations about things like different types of couches, beds, and rugs, It’s a handy guide for things that one might not really think about or think one needs to know until they find themselves needing to buy a mattress and not really sure what the different options mean.

For each room, De Barra offers a ‘Min’ option – which is basically just playing around with what one already has in the house. Then there’s the ‘Tszuj’ (which is I had to look up, and then realised I knew what she was saying but that’s not how I’d spell it) – this is about making some changes without spending a ton of money, and then the Overhaul, which is what one would expect, and involves a lot more in terms of money, time, and work.

I kept a little notebook and wrote down some ideas (a couple of which I’ve already incorporated), and the illustrations are great. Now I just need to re-read the parts that talk about art on the walls, as that was kind of the main point of purchasing the book.

What’s next for this book:
Keep to refer to next time I’m updating a room.

Sunday

15

September 2024

0

COMMENTS

The Dinner Guest by B P Walters

Written by , Posted in Reviews

Three Stars

Best for:
Anyone interesting in a distracting read while doing chores or things round the house.

In a nutshell:
Michael has been murdered. Rachel has confessed. But did she really do it?

Worth quoting:
N/A

Why I chose it:
Audible had a two-for-one sale and this seemed like something I’d enjoy.

Review:
Charlie and Michael are a married couple, and fathers to Michael’s adopted son Titus, who is about 14 years old. They are VERY rich, and one thing they do is host a book club with their rich friends. Well, Michael does; Charlie doesn’t participate. One day they meet Rachel at a bookstore, Michael invites her to join the book club, and Charlie is instantly suspicious.

Also, we know that Michael is murdered at some point.

The book is told from the perspectives of Charlie and Rachel, and travels back between the murder and when Rachel first came into their lives about a year earlier. Usually I enjoy this style of book, and this one was fine, but I think there were a few things that made it less enjoyable for me than other similar books.

First off – Charlie is DEEPLY unlikeable. Obviously books that focus on rich people run that risk, as so often rich people are extremely out of touch. But Charlie is more than that, though I can’t quite explain it. And I’m all for an unlikeable protagonist, but I don’t think this was done well. Or maybe it’s because he seems somewhat one-dimensional in his unlikeability – he’s just not written in a complex way.

Rachel is … fine.

And the way the son Titus is written felt a bit off as well – like how someone who doesn’t have children (and I don’t have them) imagine a teen boy would rebel?

There are a couple of twists, and I sort of saw them both coming, though they weren’t SO obvious as to spoil the whole thing. I’d say this is better read as a library book than a purchase.

What’s next for this book:
Discard

Wednesday

11

September 2024

0

COMMENTS

The Wrong Sister by Claire Douglas

Written by , Posted in Reviews

Four Stars

Best for:
Do you like a mystery? Do like stories told from a few perspectives? Do you like family intrigue?

In a nutshell:
Tasha and her husband Aaron do a home swap with Tasha’s sister Alice and her husband Kyle. Tasha and Aaron head to Kyle’s vacation home in Venice; Alice and Kyle stay to take care of Tasha and Aaron’s twin girls. Two nights later, Kyle is dead and Alice is in the hospital.

Worth quoting:
N/A

Why I chose it:
I had a credit on Audible and I have enjoyed Douglas’s other books.

Review:
Ah, another good one. Very interesting and, once again, there’s a twist, but perhaps it either isn’t the one the reader is expecting, or it is, but it’s far to early for everything to be resolved.

The book is told primarily from the perspectives of Tasha and her mother Jeanette though Alice and another character Bonnie share their perspectives a few times. We don’t get any chapters from the perspectives of the men in this book, and once again it does seem like the author is more interested in telling the stories of women.

As it is a mystery, I can’t give too much away, but I do appreciate how the author weaves in the roles individuals – especially children – get put into at a young age, and how those roles influence their lives as they age. Some of us with siblings probably can relate at least one characteristic that they’ve been told by their parents that they have, but their sibling doesn’t, or vice versa, and whether that ends up holding true in adulthood, it still influences how they act within their family. The smart one, the fashionable one, the family-oriented one.

I also appreciate that, once again, the author is telling a story about how people may not really know who their family member is and what they are capable of doing. Some people might seem incredibly close, but perhaps there’s a whole side they never share. The author isn’t saying that everyone is keeping secrets and no one can be trusted; it’s more that everyone has a lot going on and they aren’t always forthcoming with what that is, and that can have some serious consequences. And at the same time, family ties are strong, and some folks will do anything for their family.

What’s next for this book:
N/A (audio book)

Monday

9

September 2024

0

COMMENTS

Cat Lady by Dawn O’Porter

Written by , Posted in Reviews

Four Stars

Best for:
Folks who like stories about women who society can’t quite place. A little bit like Eleanor Oliphant is Completely Fine, but different.

In a nutshell:
Mia is married to Tristan, stepmother to Oliver, and deals with Tristan’s ex wife Belinda on a daily basis. She is an executive at a very small business, and has started attending a pet grief support group. Only issue: her beloved cat Pigeon is very much still alive.

Worth quoting:
“There must be so much freedom when you know you’ll always land on your feet.”

“Rather than society acknowledging women who are struggling and helping them, they put firm hands on our shoulders and push us into the darkness.”

“Nothing is a waste of time if it gets you to where you’re supposed to be.”

Why I chose it:
I needed a book to read while getting my latest tattoos, one of which is a picture of one of my cats. Seemed like a good fit.

Review:
While my review doesn’t go into detail, I should say that the book itself should have a content note for pet loss and grief, emotional abuse, and unexpectedly graphic sex scenes (there aren’t many, and they sort of fit, but they still pulled me a bit out of the book).

There is a lot to not like about Mia. She’s very judgmental for someone who is so deeply annoyed at other people judging her. She’s the type of manager who would drive many people to leave a job; she has strong negative opinions about people with tattoos. There’s also a lot to like about Mia. She’s also someone who cares very deeply for her step-son, someone who takes good care of her husband, and who loves her 16-year-old cat Pigeon very, very much.

Mia has had a challenging life, and has made some choices that got her to where she is now. Over the course of the book, she undergoes a transformation, allowing her to become the authentic version of herself. Along the way, she examines what it means to be a wife (and if she even wants to be one), to be the head of a small business, to have so much of one’s love and affection tied up in one’s cat. What do we need from others? What should we be willing to give to others? And is it reasonable to assume the answers to those questions will be the same for everybody?

As someone who has two 13-year-old cats, and would do pretty much anything for them, I appreciate Mia’s respect for the relationship between pet carer and animal. I appreciate how the author discusses pet loss in the grief group, and how for some people, their animals can really be the things that help them get out of bed and keep going every day. At the same time, she does a great job of showing how important relationships with other people are as well. She looks at how we don’t know what other people are going through unless we make the space for them to be comfortable to share it with us, and that everyone is going through something.

What’s next for this book:
I’m not quite sure. The book, like its protagonist, is a bit odd. So I might hold onto it and read it again. Or I might donate it.

Saturday

7

September 2024

0

COMMENTS

Pew by Catherine Lacey

Written by , Posted in Reviews

Four Stars

Best for:
Those who enjoy a well-written fable. Those who don’t need certainty in their books.

In a nutshell:
Pew shows up in the town church one morning, and the townspeople don’t know what to do with them. Over the course of the week, Pew is pawned off on a variety of people who feel a strong need to fill the silence.

Worth quoting:
“You can’t be sure of who someone really is, or really was, before you knew them … or even after, sometimes.”

“But what about when you lose someone who is still alive? When you lose track of the person you know within a person they’ve become — what kind of grief is that?”

Why I chose it:
The plot was intriguing and I love a good meditation on life.

Review:
There is a lot going on in this book, but the plot itself is very simple: Pew, someone of indeterminate age, gender, and race (though likely young enough to not be considered an adult), has appeared in town, found sleeping in a church pew on a Sunday morning (hence the name). The family whose pew they were sleeping in decided to take them home, to decide ‘what to do with them.’

Right from the start, we know that Pew is different from most people we encounter. The entire book is told from their perspective, but they don’t have a lot of information to share about themselves; not with the reader and definitely not with the townspeople. They become almost a vessel or (in some cases) a dumping ground for the thoughts, concerns, and hopes of the people they encounter. Pew generally doesn’t speak, doesn’t touch others, but isn’t ‘rude’ or disagreeable. They are just there, and for the most part going along with what the townspeople demand they do, except for some (very understandable) moments when they refuse to participate.

Most of what happens in the book is in the discussions – well, in the talking at that occurs when people encounter Pew. Some people assume things about Pew’s background, like they must have suffered some horrible tragedy, or must have committed some crime. Some take Pew’s silence as rudeness or obstinance; others make kinder assumptions.

Some of the townspeople are full of self-righteousness. There are quite a few conversations that talk about people being born wicked, broken, needed religion. On the flip side, some conversations explore the idea that it’s a bit of a shame that some folks appear to need religion to even consider being kind to others.

The biggest running theme I saw was how desperate some people are to be able to put folks into boxes. They need to know someone’s age, their background, their race, their gender, so they can feel comfortable and make the necessary assumptions about them. And how when they don’t have that information, they can get more and more frustrated, and can assume the worst. At the same time, it is clear throughout the interactions in the book that knowing what people are willing to share about themselves doesn’t necessarily mean one knows them at all. With information or not, people make assumptions and categorize people in ways that may or may not be accurate, and that isn’t great.

One thing I found interesting is that throughout all of this, none of Pew’s narration sounds like them judging anyone. They’re observing, they’re interacting, but even when some fairly shitty action and assumptions are made about them, they aren’t interested in using that information to make judgments about the person’s individual character.

I could imagine reading this multiple times and getting something different out of it each time.

What’s next for this book:
Donate

Wednesday

4

September 2024

0

COMMENTS

The Couple at No. 9 by Claire Douglas

Written by , Posted in Reviews

4 Stars

Best for:
Mystery fans who enjoy jumping back and forth across time.

In a nutshell:
Saffy and her husband Tom live in a bungalow gifted to her by her grandmother Rose. While making some renovations, two sets of remains are found buried in the garden.

Worth quoting:
N/A

Why I chose it:
I read one of Douglas’s previous books earlier this year and found it to be interesting and well written.

Review:
Ah, I love a book where we hear from different perspectives and jump around in time. As this is a mystery, I’ll share the set-up and characters, and provide a little bit of information on what made me like the books.

Perspective Chapters from:
Saffy: In her early 20s, who lives in the house her grandmother Rose gifted to her via her daughter Lorna.

Lorna: Saffy’s mother, who had her at age 16 and who now lives in Spain.

Rose: Saffy’s grandmother and Lorna’s mother, who is in a care home and now has Alzheimer’s.

Theo: A chef in his 30s who doesn’t understand why his father is so interested in news of the discovery of human remains in a town far away

There are also others who play a big role in the book, including Theo’s father, a woman named Daphne, and Saffy’s husband Tom, but they don’t tell things from their perspectives.

The characters in this one – especially the women – are well developed. Theo doesn’t have as much space in the book, but we do get a sense of who he is and his relationship with his father.

I appreciate how the author plays with the idea of memory – what we see, what we know. What two different people might remember, and what happens when our memories become mixed up with other things, or start to fade altogether.

I think this book is different enough from the previous one that I’ll probably check out more of her work when I’m looking for something to read while I have a bunch of chores to do.

What’s next for this book:
Recommend to folks who might enjoy it.

Saturday

31

August 2024

0

COMMENTS

The Ghost Cat by Alex Howard

Written by , Posted in Reviews

Four Stars

Best for:
Those who enjoy a little bit of history with their sentimentality. Those who love cats.

In a nutshell:
Grimalkin is a cat living in a tenement in Edinburgh in the 1880s. One day he passes away, and a cat god is shocked to learn that little Grimalkin has only gotten to live one of his nine lives. He is granted the other eight with the understanding he has three to stay (of which he has used one), three to stray, and three to play.

Worth quoting:
“…it was the suffocating burden of holding knowledge he could do nothing with.”

Why I chose it:
I was visiting Edinburgh. And there’s a cat. I mean, come on.

Review:
What a sweet little book. Admittedly I am a cat lover, so any book told about or from the perspective of a cat is going to be for me.

Grimalkin travels across a dozen decades, living just a day in each time. His eight lives allow him to witness all sorts of changes, all taking place in and around a tenement in Edinburgh. He connects to his first owner; he overhears man landing on the moon. He feels sadness and freedom and confusion and peace. Also, he can read.

It’s fun to think about how so much has changed over the last century, and explore what it would be like to just be dropped into a time in the future and have to understand what on earth you are seeing. Imagine going from a time without electricity to a time with mobile phones. Or suddenly being aware of the availability of commercially produced snack foods. At least Grimalkin knows to expect something new each time he wakes up, though it is always a surprise to determine how much time has passed since his last life.

The book is an easy read – each life is a chapter, so they are almost like little connected essays. And Grimalkin is such a … well, he’s such a cat! He’s terrified of the vacuum cleaner. He hates dogs. He’s mischievous and loving and sweet and a bit of a jerk. And he feels the longing for connection and love, as he can experience these lives, but he can’t be seen or touched, and that is hard for a kitten. Or anyone.

What’s next for this book:
Donate so others can enjoy its sweetness.