ASK Musings

No matter where you go, there you are.

Monthly Archive: April 2018

Sunday

29

April 2018

0

COMMENTS

Rich People Problems by Kevin Kwan

Written by , Posted in Reviews

4 Stars

Best for: People who want some resolution of the dangling storylines from China Rich Girlfriend.

In a nutshell: The family matriarch is dying and is still estranged from one of her grandkids. Most potential heirs start acting even more entitled.

Worth quoting: N/A

Why I chose it: I read the first two books over the course of three days. I needed to know what happened next.

Review: (Spoilers below)
I didn’t fully enjoy how every storyline was tied up, but for the most part I found this to be and extremely satisfying end to the trilogy. The absurdity is ramped up a bit, and there’s a bit of a deus ex machina at the end, but whatever. The entire series is a messy soap opera and I loved it.

The character of Rachel continues to be a mostly non-entity, despite having been the instigator for the first book and our access point into this incomprehensible world. But that’s okay – there are other interesting women to follow, like Astrid, who has one of the more interesting arcs of the story. Some of the men are interesting and complicated as well.

There are also some REAL simple dudes. Oh Eddie. Eddie, you are the worst, and I thoroughly enjoyed every moment when things didn’t go your way. I also found the evolution of Michael’s character to be intriguing – when he had (relatively) little money, he was a good father and partner who just wanted a way out of the life he knew didn’t fit him; as soon as he starts to get money he become overbearing and controlling and an ass.

My favorite part of the book came halfway through, when the matriarch’s will was read. Sometimes my eyes will dart over the full page and certain names will stand out, so I covered the pages with my hand so I couldn’t skim ahead. And it was worth it. So glorious.

I read these three books over the course of four days. I haven’t inhaled a series like this since … probably The Hunger Games. I enjoyed the frivolity and decadence, sure, but I also enjoyed the characters. I can’t wait to read what Mr. Kwan comes up with next.

Sunday

29

April 2018

0

COMMENTS

What I’m Reading – 29 April 2018

Written by , Posted in What I'm Reading

Horrific Executive, Legislative, and Judicial Action

“Tribal leaders want an exemption from new Medicaid work rules being introduced in several states, and they say there are precedents for health care exceptions. Native Americans don’t have to pay penalties for not having health coverage under Obamacare’s individual mandate, for instance. But the Trump administration contends the tribes are a race rather than separate governments, and exempting them from Medicaid work rules — which have been approved in three states and are being sought by at least 10 others — would be illegal preferential treatment. “HHS believes that such an exemption would raise constitutional and federal civil rights law concerns,” according to a review by administration lawyers.” Trump challenges Native Americans’ historical standing(by Dan Diamond for Politico)

Drugs

“”The war on drugs in large part became a war on people who needed opportunity and treatment. While we cannot reverse all the harm that was done, we must do our part to give Seattle residents — including immigrants and refugees — a clean slate,” she added. Voters in Washington legalized the recreational use of marijuana in the state in 2012. Durkan also expressed in the statement that marijuana policies adversely affect undocumented immigrant populations living in Washington state, creating an extra barrier to citizenship.” Seattle officials file motion to vacate marijuana convictions (by John Bowdon for The Hill)

Immigration

“Judge John D. Bates of Federal District Court for the District of Columbia said that the administration’s decision to terminate the program, Deferred Action for Childhood Arrivals, or DACA, was based on the “virtually unexplained” grounds that the program was “unlawful.” The judge stayed his decision for 90 days and gave the Department of Homeland Security, which administers the program, the opportunity to better explain its reasoning for canceling it. If the department fails to do so, it “must accept and process new as well as renewal DACA applications,” Judge Bates said in the decision.” U.S. Must Keep DACA and Accept New Applications, Federal Judge Rules (by Miriam Jordan for The New York Times)

Reproductive Rights

“The images on the posters haunt me throughout the day. I am not thinking about the distraught woman waiting for tablets to come through the letter-box. I do not know about her yet. Her life is too complicated to hang on a street light. She keeps her story to herself. It’s far too long to fit on a poster. It’s longer than a novel. Unlike the foetus on the poster, she has a million things going on in her head. She cries. She is afraid. She too knows all about the foetus. She has thought about nothing else for days. She calls it a baby in her mind. In her heart too. She knows how many weeks it is. She knows what size it is. It is much smaller than her thumb. She wonders if it is a boy or girl. She wishes things were different. But they are not. She has gone over and over it – a million times.” Anti-abortion posters fail to take account of life (by Chris Fitzpatrick for The Irish Times)

Racism

“At the second hole, a white man whose son co-owns the club came up to them twice to complain that they weren’t keeping up with the pace of play. Thompson, an attorney and the head of the York chapter of the NAACP, told the newspaper it was untrue. On the same hole, another member of the group, Sandra Harrison, said she spoke with a Grandview golf pro, who said they were fine since they were keeping pace with the group ahead of them. Despite that, the women skipped the third hole to avoid any other issues, she said.” Golf club apologizes for calling cops on black women members (Via AP)

“An official statement from the company says that Clemons’ story differs from that of police. Despite the violent arrest being captured on video which has gone viral, Waffle House issued a statement saying they support how police handled the situation. “After reviewing our security video of the incident and eyewitness accounts, police intervention was appropriate,” the statement said.” Waffle House Issued A Statement Supporting The Arrest Of Chikesia Clemons: Where Is The National Outrage Over Her Case? (by Ricky Riley for Blavity)

“My fear was also related to a problem much bigger than what happened at Starbucks — a problem the anti-racial bias training the company has scheduled for its employees can’t even begin to address. The police in this country have long been empowered to respond to white anxiety about the very presence of black people. The 1863 “Ordinance to establish patrols for the police of slaves in the Parish of St. Landry” is an early example. “Every free white male person, having attained the age of 16 years and not above the age of 60 years, who shall reside in the State of Louisiana and Parish of St. Landry, shall be bound to do patrol duty within the limits of the patrol district in which he resides,” it read. This piece of legislation allowed white men to directly police black people.” A Problem Starbucks Can’t Train Away (by Steven W. Thrasher for The New York Times)

Fat Awareness

“Regardless, that’s not my biggest problem. My biggest problem is that, while the thrift store is for everyone and it’s certainly legal for her and other thin people who want to do the same thing to buy clothes that don’t fit them, that choice does not happen in a vacuum. Plus size clothing is hard to come by. It’s much, much harder to come by in thrift stores. This is significant because fat people also get hired less and paid less than thin people, and thus are more likely to actually NEED the kind of cheap clothing that a thrift store would offer.” Should Thin People “Re-Purpose” Plus Size Thrift Clothes (by Regan Chastain for Dances with Fat)

Fighting Misogyny

“Official retribution was swift. “In the end, after I’d finished the race, I was disqualified and expelled from the athletics federation because I had run with men, because I had run more than a mile and a half and because I had fraudulently entered the race, which was not true – and the worst one was because I had run without a chaperone. It just shows the attitude that existed in 1967: people thought that if women ran they would turn into a man or that it was socially objectionable.”” Woman who blazed a trail for equality in marathons hits London’s starting line (by Jamie Doward for The Guardian)

Fighting Racism

“39. Recognize that you can’t assume someone’s religion based on how they look. Not all South Asians and Middle Eastern people are Muslims, not all Black people are Christian, not all East Asian people are Buddhist. You get the idea.” 100 Ways White People Can Make Life Less Frustrating For People of Color (by Kesiena Boom for Broadly)

“Kaepernick first took a knee during the pre-game playing of the American national anthem when he was with the 49ers in 2016 to protest police brutality. Other players joined him, drawing the ire of President Donald Trump, who called for team owners to fire such players. In response to the player demonstrations, the NFL agreed to commit $90 million over the next seven years to social justice causes in a plan. Amnesty International Secretary General Salil Shetty called Kaepernick “an athlete who is now widely recognized for his activism because of his refusal to ignore or accept racial discrimination.”” Colin Kaepernick, NFL quarterback, honored by Amnesty for inequality protests (Via AP)

Something Good

Friday

27

April 2018

0

COMMENTS

China Rich Girlfriend by Kevin Kwan

Written by , Posted in Reviews

4 Stars

Best for: People who enjoyed the first in this series (Crazy Rich Asians)

In a nutshell: We follow many of the original characters — and a few new ones — in this second book in the trilogy.

Worth quoting: N/A

Why I chose it:
I bought this at the same time as I bought China Rich Girlfriend because I figured I was going to like that and would want to start the sequel immediately.

Review: (Spoilers below)
I feel like I’m reading an amazing soap-opera, and I continue to thoroughly enjoy it. Yes, it’s all over-the-top and ridiculous. Yes, some of the characters are horrible and unlikeable, but I appreciate how many of them are changing over the course of the two novels.

Before I get too far into this review, I want to say how much I appreciated that Mr. Kwan played around a little with the formatting of the chapters this go round. We still get different point of view chapters, but we also have some chapters that consists solely of emails, or diary entries, or text messages. One is even the instructions offered by a super-fancy life coach (I’m sure she’d cringe at that description of her role, but eh, that’s what she is in my view) to someone who is desperate to be accepted.

Okay, so the content of the book. As I said above, I like the evolution of the different characters. We see some parents taking dramatic steps related to their children. We see some formerly humble folks turn into nightmares, and some nightmares humble themselves. Estrangements still exist in some areas, but in others they get resolved.

From a storytelling perspective, I appreciate that the will they / won’t they of Nick and Rachel is handled quickly, and their wedding happens in the first third of the book. I also enjoyed most of the handling of Rachel’s relationship with her father and brother. I do think Rachel could bee built out more, but at the same time, it’s nice to have a character who isn’t completely beyond reasonableness. She is an economics professor; she’s a smart woman who doesn’t seem interested in drama. While I LOVE reading about drama, I wouldn’t enjoy it happening to me, so I like that she mostly rolls with things, and then occasionally, when appropriate, says exactly what needs to be said, regardless of the ‘appropriateness’ of it from the perspective of many of these extremely rich families.

Like I said, I’m still enjoying these books. I read the last few pages of this one while on the bus to pick up the final one, and I started it as soon as I walked out of the book shop. I’ll go back to my dense non-fiction books next week, but for now I’m loving spending some time in this world.

Thursday

26

April 2018

0

COMMENTS

Smoking in Public

Written by , Posted in Etiquette

There’s an issue that’s been swirling around my head (literally and figuratively) since moving back to London. And I’m willing to bet that it’s not just an issue for me, but for many of the other 84% of folks living in the UK who don’t smoke either.

I’m talking about smoking in public.

First, I want to make it clear that this isn’t a post about someone’s choice to start or continue smoking. Sure, it’s not the healthiest thing a person can do, but you don’t owe me — or anyone else — a life of healthy choices. I mean, I’m literally drinking liquid sugar (a.k.a hot chocolate) as I type this, so I can’t exactly judge.

Second, this isn’t an attempt to get smokers to stop smoking. I have friends who smoke. They know the statistics and the risks. Sure, I’d love it if no one smoked anymore, but it’s not my call.

If you’re a smoker who doesn’t care about being a jerk when you smoke, then this post isn’t for you! But for those who smoke and do care, this is for you.

Walking while smoking
You’re late for an appointment. You just got off the bus (where you obviously can’t light up), and you only have ten minutes until your next appointment. It also, coincidentally, takes ten minutes to walk there. Perfect time to grab a quick cigarette, right?

Please don’t. Or at least, please think about your surroundings before doing so. If it’s a busy street, or a busy time of day, you’re exposing a whole bunch of people to chemicals that they didn’t ask to be exposed to. And the nature of walking means that anyone going in your direction will either have to jog past you if they’re able, or be stuck with your smoke in their face until their path diverges from yours, and anyone walking towards you will end up walking directly through your smoke cloud. That’s kind of a jerk move.

Also, as an aside, people who walk while smoking will often (out of necessity, I assume) flick some ash along the way. I’ve been on the receiving end of such ash more than once, including a hot bit that flew directly into my eye. That shit HURT. And yes, it’s possible that I will be injured by other items while out in public — say, by an oblivious person walking directly into me — but the existence of other boorish actions doesn’t excuse all of them.

Smoking in parks and at the beach
It’s a beautiful day in London. The grass is finally dry, there’s not a cloud in sight, and it’s the weekend! Time to lay out the blanket and breathe in some clean air.

Until someone lights up a cigarette 15 feet away. Then the lovely day turns into an obstacle course wherein non-smokers attempt to dodge any group that includes smokers. Of course, people who smoke don’t smoke all the time, so it’s nearly impossible to pick a spot that guarantees freedom from something that causes me to cough like I myself have been smoking three packs a day for 20 years.

In the UK a couple of years ago they explored banning smoking anywhere that children play. I mean, cool, but it’s not just children who should have access to cleaner air. It’s great to start with kids, but eventually I’d love it if we cared about the air that everyone inhales.

And before you point out that there will be other smells (and sounds) that are unpleasant and might put a damper on a day at the park or beach, I know. But I’m talking about smoking right now, not whether forcing other people to listen to your choice of music at full volume is acceptable (it’s not).

Smoking right at the door
In the US, smoking laws vary, but in places where there are smoking bans, there are often rules about the distance one must be from an entrance before lighting up. That doesn’t appear to be the case in the UK, which seems a bit ridiculous. Having to pass through a cloud of smoke every time one leaves or enters a business is not cool, so smokers, I’d ask that you move well away from all building entrances before lighting up.

Smoking at the bus stop
You’ve got what is essentially a captive audience here, so unless there’s a way to position yourself so your smoke blows away from everyone at the stop, please reconsider lighting up.

A word on vaping
Congratulations to those who have shifted from cigarettes to vaping! Unfortunately, many people who vape seem to think that the stuff they are exhaling is harmless, but it’s not. It’s quite nasty, and seems to create a much larger cloud than traditional smoking. Sure, it doesn’t smell the same as cigarettes, but I still have no interest in walking through a cloud of peppermint-tinged nicotine and propylene glycol. So please follow the same considerations suggested above, even though you aren’t smoking cigarettes anymore.

So … where should people smoke?
Banning smoking in the workplace and all enclosed public spaces was a great move from a public health perspective. I’ve also at times hoped for a ban of smoking in all public spaces, but one unfortunate consequence of banning smoking in public outright is that it can be engineered as a way to harass unhoused people, which is definitely not cool. Smokers also often have lower incomes, so anti-smoking laws and regulations (in places like public housing for example) may disproportionately impact already marginalized populations. I’m not interested in that, either, so instead I’m just going to hope that smokers simply look around and consider the affect they have on the people around them.

Wednesday

25

April 2018

0

COMMENTS

Crazy Rich Asians by Kevin Kwan

Written by , Posted in Reviews

4 Stars

Best for: People looking for a comic look at the absurdity of obscene wealth.

In a nutshell: Nick is the kind of wealthy that never talks about money. His girlfriend Rachel doesn’t know it. He brings her home to Singapore to meet his family, and things get awkward.

Worth quoting:
“All her life she’d been treated like a hothouse flower, when in fact she was a wildflower that was never allowed to bloom fully.”
(I find this metaphor — or is it simile? — ridiculous because women =/= flowers, but I also weirdly like the imagery.)

Why I chose it:
The film’s trailer was released two days ago. I decided it was finally time to suck it up and pick it up (I’d been avoiding it for years because I don’t like the use of words like ‘crazy.’).

Review:
(some minor spoilers below)

After I finished the book I went back to read other Cannonball Read reviews. I’m intrigued by how many folks thought it wasn’t that great — I think maybe we viewed it through different lenses? I went into this knowing that I would find so much of it absurd, and I think the fact that the author is clearly both interested in pointing out the absurdity of many of these people AND is aware that lots of people like absurdly fancy shit (whether than can afford it or not) made it pretty easy for me to dive into this ridiculous world for awhile.

I loved the book. I devoured it. I enjoyed that Mr. Kwan was able to write chapters from multiple perspectives. (Seriously, that takes talent, to not just create many characters, but to take their point of view and have them really be different characters.) I liked that while some of the women were horrible, they weren’t all just one-dimensional materialistic harpies. There were very rich women that were appealing, and very rich women who … super weren’t. The men were also more complicated than just absent fathers or playboys. Nick, for example, seems to be a genuinely good guy, but his actions result in some pretty serious distress for quite a few people because he lacks some self-awareness. Astrid is obviously someone who has no real comprehension of how much money she has, but she’s also, to me, extremely likable in trying to lead a life that matches what her husband is comfortable with.

One of my favorite parts are the friendships between Colin and Nick and between Rachel and Piek Lin. Colin and Araminta pick Nick and Rachel up from the airport in Singapore is so … normal. These are people we will come to learn are essentially Singapore royalty, and they want to do the things friends do: welcome their friends to town and take them out. I also like that Rachel is pretty chill for most of the trip, and then when it makes sense, just sort of loses her shit. Not in a theatric way, but in the way many people do: she completely shuts down.

At the same time, I also like how unlikable so many of characters are. Nick’s mother Eleanor and her friends are obnoxious and kind of shitty parents. They can convince themselves they’re trying to do what is best for their kids, but they don’t really KNOW their kids at all. And Eddie … I’ve not wanted to smack a character so badly as I did here. What. An. Asshole.

I’ve seen some reviews that chastise Mr. Kwan for being so ostentatious in his descriptions of things like clothing and decor, but I feel it’s necessary. This isn’t the kind of rich I’m familiar with — these are definitely not the Kardashians. These are next-level rich, and I think that’s fascinating. It’s not the only thing I want to read about in life because it’s not realistic, but then neither is the world of Game of Thrones. If the only books available were books like this, that would be a problem (I want novels about people who aren’t absurdly rich), but I think Mr. Kwan does a great job with this one. I’m interested in the characters, and I’m putting off starting the next book until tomorrow because it’s late and I know I’ll just stay up reading it.

Sunday

22

April 2018

0

COMMENTS

What I’m Reading – 22 April 2018

Written by , Posted in What I'm Reading

UK Immigration Policy Horror

“When Gretel arrived at Tilbury Docks in East London, aged 24, all those years ago, she had a Jamaican ­passport with a stamp inside giving her indefinite leave to remain. But that document was stolen in a 2006 burglary at her house in Lambeth. She applied for a new one and her daughter Pauline ­Blackwood immediately filed a police report. The authorities told Gretel she would not be given a UK passport and if she left Britain she would need to apply for a visa on her new Jamaican passport.” “I’m heartbroken I can’t rejoin my children in Britain”: Windrush gran blocked from UK after living here for 59 years (by Christopher Bucktin for The Mirror)

“There were angry exchanges at Prime Ministers Questions yesterday as the Labour Leader called Theresa May’s government “both callous and incompetent” after it emerged that Brits who had lived for generations in the UK faced being wrongly deported to Commonwealth countries, the evidence for when the Windrush generation had arrived in the UK having been destroyed by the Home Office.” Theresa May’s ‘Hostile Environment’ immigration policy compared to ‘Nazi Germany’ by her own ministers (by Ben Gelblum for The London Economic)

“If you are angry about the treatment of the Windrush generation it is important to understand that this anger cannot be selective, if there are to be no more violations. There is no cross-party, cross-media support for a different type of immigration policy victim than the Windrush scandal has managed to muster. Not for those who are illegally detained, those on hunger strike in protest against poor conditions. Not for those whose illnesses were treated as lies and to which they later succumbed. Not for the sexually exploited and not for the children separated from their parents. Not even for those British subjects separated from their families by unreasonably high income visa requirements.” It’s not just Windrush. Theresa May has created hostility to all immigrants (by Nesrine Malik for The Guardian)

“Robinson was told that he did not have the correct paperwork to get into the UK, even though he had lived, worked and paid taxes there his whole life. The grandfather of three was forced to say goodbye to his relatives at the departure gate. “I felt like someone had just punched me in the head. ‘What do you mean, I cannot come back?’ I thought. The next day it really hit me that I was not with my family,” he says. He says he ended up staying in Jamaica for 21 months, stranded and living in one-room bedsits and cheap hostels.” Windrush generation tell of holidays that led to exile and heartbreak (by Sarah Marsh, Haroon Siddique and Caroline Bannock for The Guardian)

Racism

“Nelson recalled asking the manager to use the bathroom after he and Robinson arrived at the Starbucks. He said she told him no because he hadn’t ordered anything. Nelson sat down at a table with Robinson — his friend since the fourth grade — and waited for Yaffe, who is white. That’s when the manager came over and asked if they were ordering anything, they said, and phoned the cops when the pair told her they were waiting to meet someone.” Starbucks manager called the cops on black men two minutes after they arrived for business meeting (by Terence Cullen for New York Daily News)

““And where are you from?” asked the prince. “Manchester, UK,” I said. “Well, you don’t look like it!” he said, and laughed. He was then ushered on to the next person. Although I have experienced such off-the-cuff, supposedly humorous, comments before, I was stunned by the gaffe. Prince Charles was endorsed by the Queen, in her opening speech to the heads of government, to be the future head of the Commonwealth: it’s her “sincere wish” that he become so. That the mooted next leader of an organisation that represents one-third of the people on the planet commented that I, a brown woman, did not look as if I was from a city in the UK is shocking.” Dear Prince Charles, do you think my brown skin makes me unBritish? (by Anita Sethi for The Guardian)

Sexual Assault

“Richard, a student and linebacker on the football team at SUNY Cortland in upstate New York, went to a house party on Long Island in July 2017 with his friends from high school while he was home from school for the summer. As he was getting ready to leave, Richard heard noises coming from the bathroom — the sounds, he said, of a woman’s cry. “I didn’t know what was going on,” Richard told BuzzFeed News. “I just knew something what up.” Using his shoulder, Richard said he and one of his friends pushed open the door and saw a man standing behind a young woman with his hand on her neck, attempting to assault her. The woman was crying and bleeding from the mouth, Richard said.” This College Junior Was Shot Twice After Stopping An Attempted Sexual Assault (by Mary Ann Georgantopoulos for BuzzFeed News)

“The House bill, which received support from across the aisle, came after a half-dozen lawmakers were forced to either resign or retire last fall in light of sexual harassment allegations, would require lawmakers to pay for harassment or discrimination claims out of their own pocket, instead of using taxpayer-funded settlements. The legislation would also mandate transparent reporting of previous harassment payouts and eliminates the requirement for Hill employees to seek counseling and mediation prior to pursuing a claim.” Male GOP senators balk at new rules requiring them to pay their own sexual harassment settlements (by Rebekah Entralgo for Think Progress)

“Towards the end of the two-hour hearing, following emotional testimonies from the survivors, Sen. Richard Blumenthal (D-CT), the ranking member of the subcommittee, asked all four if they thought that sexual abuse was ongoing in their respective sports. A few responded that they were certain it was: not only are the current policies still insufficient from both a response and prevention standpoint, but, as Farrell said, “I think the majority of athletes and coaches are wonderful people, but every child molester would love to be a coach.”” Survivors stun senators with testimony on prevalence of sexual abuse in sports (by Lindsay Gibbs for Think Progress)

“Despite all of that, this year’s Coachella experience was also full of moments I never saw on Instagram: being repeatedly violated by strangers. In the three days I was at Coachella, I only spent a total of 10 hours at the actual festival, where I watched numerous performances and interviewed festivalgoers about their experience with sexual assault and harassment for Teen Vogue. During the 10 hours I was reporting on this story, I was groped 22 times.” Sexual Harassment Was Rampant at Coachella 2018 (by Vera Papisova for Teen Vogue)

“At Penn State, sorority women are 50 percent more likely than other female students to be sexually assaulted, and fraternity men are 62 percent more likely to commit a sexual assault than other male students, according to the university’s most recent Sexual Assault Campus Climate survey. Erin Farley, programming coordinator at Penn State’s Gender Equity Center, said 1 in 4 women and 1 in 16 men say they’ve been sexually assaulted at Penn State, according to the anonymous survey.” ‘Like sharks looking for minnows’: Sexual assault is a problem in Penn State’s Greek culture (by Sarah Rafacz for The Centre Daily)

Transphobia

“The 30th anniversary of the anti-gay legislation known as section 28 is a useful moment to pause and examine the parallels between the trans and gay movements: not only are the struggles analogous in that they were both designed to improve the legal rights of a minority group; the responses they provoked have been at times eerily similar.” Today’s anti-trans rhetoric looks a lot like old-school homophobia (by Shon Faye for The Guardian)

Housing

“A report, Housing for the Many, accuses ministers of stretching the term affordable to breaking point to include homes let at up to 80% of market rents – more than £1,500 a month in some areas – and homes for sale up to £450,000. “It has become a deliberately malleable phrase, used to cover up a shift in government policy towards increasingly expensive and insecure homes,” it says. The Labour leader and John Healey, the shadow housing secretary, set out the party’s plans to link affordability to people’s incomes on tenures including social rent, living rent and low-cost ownership, in the 40-page green paper, to be launched on Thursday.” Labour would rip up definition of affordable housing, Corbyn says (by Heather Stewart for The Guardian)

Corporate Malfeasance

“According to the New Food Economy, Amazon ranks high on the list of employers with massive numbers of employees enrolled in SNAP (the Supplemental Nutrition Assistance Program, otherwise known as food stamps). In Ohio, around one in 10 Amazon employees uses SNAP; in Pennsylvania, about one in nine. In Arizona, nearly one in three Amazon employees is enrolled in the food stamp program.” A large number of Amazon workers rely on food stamps for assistance (by Luke Barnes for Think Progress)

“Owen and Demetric, father and son, allege in the lawsuit that Demetric’s supervisors hurled racist statements like, “All you f***ing n***ers,” Bloomberg reported. Owen told Bloomberg that the racist statements made him feel helpless. “It made me feel like I was less than a man,” Owen Diaz said. “I couldn’t do anything.” Owen and Demetric were contractors at Tesla who worked with firms West Valley Staffing Group and Citistaff Solutions. They are suing all three firms who have denied the allegations, Bloomberg reported.” Former Tesla Contractors File Discrimination Lawsuit Against The Company Claiming Racial Bias and Harassment (by Kimberley Richards for Blavity)

Friday

20

April 2018

0

COMMENTS

Things That Make White People Uncomfortable by Michael Bennett

Written by , Posted in Reviews

Five Stars

Best for: Anyone interested in a compelling story about how a professional athlete lives his values.

In a nutshell: Former (sniff) Seattle Seahawk and current Philadelphia Eagle team member Michael Bennett shares his prospective on a wide range of topics, including the NCAA, the NFL, racism, and sexism.

Line that sticks with me:
“They also tell us to stick to sports when we speak out on issues. But they don’t seem to have a problem when we’re making commercials, selling their kids sneakers they can’t afford or fast food that will give them colon cancer.”
“But none of this is new, and we shouldn’t pretend it is. Racists may be more confident now because of who is in the White House, but it’s been there all along.”
“I think their real reason for calling me a liar is their whole worldview is built around the idea that racism in policing doesn’t exist. They would rather live in the comfort of that fiction than be forced to confront the uncomfortable truth: that racial profiling is a reality.”
“I realized that I wouldn’t be the person I aspire to be if I called out injustice here at home and just stopped at our border. It doesn’t work that way.”

Why I chose it: I mean, a former Seahawk writing about things like social justice? Sign me up.

Review:
I grew up loving professional football. I was a 49ers fan, and got to attend many games growing up. However, I didn’t watch a single game in the 2017-2018 season, because of how the league treated Colin Kaepernick. I wrote about my decision here.

But living in Seattle, it was impossible to avoid news of the Seahawks, and Michael Bennett (until recently) was a major piece of that team. So when I heard he was writing a book — and with Dave Zirin, whose work I’ve reviewed before — I knew I had to pick it up. Saw it at the airport before returning to London this week, and I’ve not been able to put it down.

This book has so many insights, it was hard to limit the number of quotes to share above. Mr. Bennett talks openly about how hard college life is for ‘student-athletes’ (who he says would more accurately be called ‘athlete-students’), how the NCAA and universities don’t give a shit about their players. He talks about life in the NFL, and the fear of CTE and how poorly retired players are treated. He shares how important the brotherhood of the Seahawks locker room has been in his growth as a player and a Black man.

He covers many topics I expected him to, like the racism inherent in calling the NFL team owners ‘owners’ when so many of the employees are Black, or Mr. Bennett’s involvement in the anthem protests. In fact, the preface could stand alone as a wonderful essay on the need to stand up (or, in this case, sit down) for what’s right. But he also talks about things like the importance of access to healthful food, or his thoughts on Palestine, or the importance of forgiveness, which I wasn’t expecting.

I think this is a book anyone with an opinion on the role of college or professional athletes should read. I also think this is a good book for anyone who is looking for inspiration to keep fighting injustice.

Note: Mr. Bennett was charged in late March with assaulting someone working security at the Super Bowl in 2017 (a felony, because the person is over 65). I find it hard to believe that the incident went down as suggested in the indictment; I’m especially suspect because of the way the Houston police chief shared it (Google the press conference if you’re interested). Mr. Bennett’s attorney has said: “He just flat-out didn’t do it. It wasn’t a case of, ‘He didn’t shove her that hard,’ or anything like that. … He never touched her.” That said, I wasn’t there, so if that’s something that might affect your interest in picking up this book, I wanted to put it out there.

Thursday

19

April 2018

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COMMENTS

Using Facebook

Written by , Posted in Etiquette

Regardless of how you choose to use Facebook, there are definitely ways you can be a jerk on there. Below are just a few things I’ve noticed over the years; I may add to this as I experience more in the future.

Friending
I have a general rule with Facebook: if I wouldn’t make the effort to grab a hot beverage or a drink with someone and talk for 20 minutes, one on one, there’s no reason for us to be friends on Facebook. However, I recognize that not everyone has this rule. People friend colleagues, all family members, people they met at a party, people who generally seem cool. Some people post all the things; some people post nothing but keep an account so they don’t miss out on invitations to events. Social media serves different purposes for different people.

Let me repeat myself: social media serves different purposes for different people. In my opinion, anyone should feel comfortable asking anyone to be their friend on Facebook, so long as they meet these criteria:

  • You have interacted with them in some way previously. That doesn’t mean you have to know them, or have met them in person. But it’s kind of a creeper move to just go looking through friend lists and sending random invites.
  • You have not been asked to leave them alone (either by them or, say, the police).
  • You will be okay if they decline your request.

This last one is key – if you are going to be hurt if they don’t accept your request, think really hard about whether you want to even send the request. If this is your best friend in the world (and you know she’s active on Facebook), or your underage child who is violating the agreement you have about social media use, then sure, have a chat. But if you send a friend request to your cousin who you haven’t seen in fifteen years and she doesn’t accept it? It’s okay! You managed to go 15 years without interacting; there might be a reason for it. And if you really want to reconnect, maybe consider sending an email.

Unfriending
I think a lot of people may have had their first taste of this just after the election. Maybe they got fed up with seeing certain political ideas defended on their walls, or maybe they just realized that life is too short to have a feed cluttered up with posts they don’t care about from people they have no intention of ever seeing again.

It’s not a jerk move to unfriend someone, and I don’t think you need to let people know that you’ve done it, or why you’ve done it. Just think about it before you do it; if you feel like someday soon your opinion might change, consider just hiding them from your feed and adding them to a list that doesn’t see your posts.

Blocking
I am currently blocking 180 individuals on Facebook. I only know six of them, and of those, only two are people I was once friends with (both are relatives – go figure). During and after the election, when friends of friends or just random strangers made hateful comments (usually of the racist or sexist variety), I would block them.

I tried to engage a couple of them, but then realized that they certainly weren’t open to any discussion with me. Is this that bubble everyone is warning me about? Sure is! I’m pretty proud to have a bubble that is generally free from Nazis and the like. It’s not a jerk move to block someone; no one has the right to force you to listen to (or read) their opinion.

Posting (political)
Nearly everything fits into this category; in fact, I’m trying to generally avoid the delineation because I think everything that happens in politics has an impact on our lives. But for now, let’s just talk about the obvious: things related to elected officials or policy. GMO labeling. Climate Change. The current inhabitant of the White House.

Post away, but in this realm, be ready for people to come at you if they disagree. That doesn’t mean you have to host every rant: your wall, your choice. Just know that people tend to see the sharing of political articles as an invitation to discuss them.

If people start spewing hateful things on a post you put up, say, supporting the right of people to use the bathroom that matches their gender, regardless of what genitals they have, shut that shit down. If they want a platform, they have their own wall for that. You might get some ‘freeze peach’ ranting, but again – you aren’t the government, you aren’t censoring them, and they don’t have a right to make you listen to them. It’s okay.

Posting (non-political)
I’m not going to retread well-worn ground here; the whole STFU tumblr craze of the late 2000s covered all manner of weird shit people post on Facebook. But as I said before, people can use social media in many different ways, so really the only asshole move here is telling someone they can’t post what they want to post.

I tend to use Twitter for witty one-liners and observations; Instagram for pictures; and Facebook for promoting this website (hey!), keeping up with friends who don’t live nearby, and sharing major life moments. Others might put everything on Facebook, or just the occasional update on life. All uses are fine.

Pictures
Please don’t individually post each of your 134 photos from your trip to Costa Rica. Create an album; if I want, I will click on it and view the contents. Otherwise I have to scroll through 134 individual pictures. I can scroll past three or four, but 134? That’s kind of a jerk move.

Also please don’t post objectively mortifying pictures of anyone without their consent – and that includes kids (especially kids that aren’t your own – let parents sort out what’s appropriate for their own little one). The beauty of the shot of Junior crying on the toilet with jam smeared all over his face is that you can show it to his college boyfriend at some point; not to 167 people you might know, including your hairdresser.

Those may be super funny, but they’re also super personal to the kids. I’m not a parent, and I don’t think parents should never post pictures; I just wish more would consider what the kid will think knowing that all the adults in his life saw him at his most vulnerable and then laughed about it.

That said, overall, even if you might not enjoy seeing a lot of pictures of babies, or vacations, or puppies, or cats, you do have the ability to hide and scroll past. I suggest we all do that a bit more often and complain to (or about) the posters a bit less.

Wednesday

18

April 2018

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COMMENTS

The Last Black Unicorn by Tiffany Haddish

Written by , Posted in Reviews

Best for: People who enjoy Tiffany Haddish

In a nutshell: Comedian and actor Tiffany Haddish shares stories – some hilarious, some serious – from her life.

Worth quoting:
“I try to forgive him. I really do try to find a place of forgiveness in my heart for him. That shit is hard, though.”

Why I chose it: I was about to board a nine-hour flight, and thought this would be a good choice for helping the time pass quickly. I was right.

Review:
Some memoirs by famous folks are co-written by someone who has more experience writing books. Ms. Haddish employed Tucker Max to assist, but I didn’t even realize it until I read the acknowledgments at the end. That is to say: this book sounds exactly like Tiffany Haddish.

Some of the chapters in this book are fantastic. Ms. Haddish is a great storyteller, and that isn’t limited to traditionally ‘funny’ fare. Her deep honesty around past relationships, and her recognition of how hard it is to understand why she returned to her abusive ex husband make the serious stories as enthralling as the funny ones. She’s been through some shit, and she doesn’t seem to hold back in sharing it all with us.

That said, I think others enjoyed this book more than I did, and I might not be being fair in my review when I say that the way she writes about her date with Roscoe (who lives in a group home and has an arm that didn’t fully develop) left me … unimpressed. That’s not to say that I think it was mean. In fact, I think Ms. Haddish comes across throughout as a very sweet woman. But I think she just missed the mark in how she told that book, and it kind of took the wind out of the second half for me. I also didn’t appreciate how she seems deeply insulted by the idea of anyone being fat. For me, that’s such a ridiculous thing to still be employing for laughs / insults that I get especially annoyed when I see it from someone who is a very smart comedian.

Monday

16

April 2018

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COMMENTS

What I’m Reading – 15 April, 2018

Written by , Posted in What I'm Reading

Horrible Legislative, Executive, and Judicial Action

“On Friday, as part of a crackdown that long predates SESTA, the country’s best known adult classifieds site, Backpage.com — a vital site for sex workers — was seized by the FBI. Without traffic from Backpage.com, the community has speculated that some will become hungry, homeless, or even dead. Professionals who serve actual trafficked victims believe the only way to track them now no longer exists.” Sex Workers Are Canaries In The Free Speech Coal Mine (by Emily Smith for BuzzFeed News)

Xenophobia

“On lawyers’ advice, the Francos waited to start legalizing his status through their marriage until late 2016, after he had lived a productive, crime-free decade in the United States. They never anticipated that President Trump’s promised immigration crackdown would be so swift, and so ruthless in their region. By last spring, when Pennsylvania roads were starting to feel like a dragnet for immigrants without papers, Ludvin Franco had mostly stopped getting behind the wheel of a car. Often he relied on his wife to drive him, their twin toddlers buckled into the backseat. But the night his soccer team faced a rival in the semifinals of an indoor league, his wife was in the queasy first trimester of a second pregnancy. He headed out alone.” In Pennsylvania, It’s Open Season on Undocumented Immigrants (by Deborah Sontag and Dale Russakoff for ProPublica)

““We are dismayed that an invited guest to our annual PEN World Voices Festival in New York, which starts on Monday, Yassmin Abdel-Magied, herself the founder of an organization called Youth Without Borders, was turned away by US Immigration officials in Minneapolis, reportedly had her phone and passport seized, and was put back on a plane to Amsterdam,” said Nossel. “Abdel-Magied is an advocate of the rights of Muslim women and refugees and is a citizen of Australia, traveling on that country’s passport.”” This Young Muslim Woman Says She Was Blocked And Deported From America Before She Could Speak At An Event Called “No Country For Young Muslim Women” (by Brad Esposito for BuzzFeed News)

Racism

“After arranging for Colin Kaepernick to work out for the Seattle Seahawks this week, team officials postponed the trip when the quarterback declined to say he would stop kneeling during the national anthem next season, a league source told ESPN on Thursday.” Seahawks postpone visit after Colin Kaepernick won’t say if he’ll stop kneeling during anthem (by Adam Schefter for ESPN)

“The GAO found that black students are overrepresented in the disciplinary data, which is a very nice way of saying that black children are punished more often and receive harsher punishments than white kids. “These disparities were widespread and persisted regardless of the type of disciplinary action, level of school poverty or type of public school attended,” the report explains (pdf).” Government Study: School Is Racist (by Michael Harriot for The Root)

“A Texas appeals court in 2010 turned down an aunt’s attempt to adopt Devonte Hart and three of his siblings because she previously violated an order barring their biological mother from seeing the children, court records show.” Devonte Hart’s aunt fought — and lost — battle for custody, court records show (by Everton Bailey, Jr. for Oregon Live)

Gun Violence

““Rep. Norman’s behavior today was a far cry from what responsible gun ownership looks like,” said Lori Freeman, a volunteer with Moms Demand Action for Gun Sense in America, who attended the event and spoke with Norman, according to the Washington Post. Another attendee, Lori Carter, said, “I felt it was highly inappropriate for an elected official, honestly, and it almost felt like an intimidation tactic.”” South Carolina congressman draws loaded weapon at constituent event (by Ryan Koronowski for Think Progress)

“On Tuesday, teens from Miami Northwestern Senior High School marched from their school’s campus to a housing complex where four young people were shot on Sunday. Kimson Green, a 17-year-old sophomore at the school, and Rickey Dixon, an 18-year-old alumnus, were killed. Students chanted: “No justice. No peace. No violence in the streets,” the Miami Herald reported.” Black Students Marched Against Gun Violence In Florida, But You Likely Didn’t Hear About It (by Sarah Ruiz-Grossman for HuffPost)

Misogyny

“After being pulled from her fifth-period class at Braden River High School, the 17-year-old from Bradenton, Florida, found herself in the dean’s office, and was told that nipples and breasts were “distracting” other students and “a boy was laughing at her,” thus she was violating school dress code policy, according to the teen and statements from school officials. Martinez said that school officials originally told her that her third-period teacher flagged the dress code issue, but later said a student came to the office to report her.” This 17-Year-Old Was Told To Put Band-Aids On Her Nipples After Not Wearing A Bra To School (by Brianna Sacks for BuzzFeed News)